Hungry Leafs Fan

The Morning After

2010-11-07T09:55:00.003-05:00

I didn't get drunk during the game last night but I sure as hell wish I did. The alcohol would have been the only thing enjoyable during that three hour block. It was a sloppy affair which both teams didn't seem to care to win. Somehow we found ourselves with a 2-0 lead so I can't complain. That's when it all started to go downhill.

Before the second period ended, Mike Brown finds himself on a 2 on 1 with Sjostrom and he doesn't even think to pass. This is easily read by the goalie and everybody else with a functioning set of eyes watching the game. Unless Mike Brown finds himself on a 2 on 1 with Colton Orr, his first option should never ever be shoot. The play then goes back down the ice and into the Leafs zone. Leopold throws a weak wrister on net from the point (which John Mitchell doesn't even attempt to block) and look who's there to clean up the garbage. Derek Roy, the guy Mike Brown was responsible for.

I don't know what was said in the locker room during the intermission but we came out playing even shittier. The Leafs mustered 3 shots in the third against Jhonas Enroth. You know, the 5'10 goalie who just got lit up against the Bruins, allowing 3 goals on 12 shots, a couple of nights ago.

This guy...

The way we were playing, I just had a feeling we wouldn't be able to hold on to the lead. I was hoping that I would be wrong but this is the Leafs we're talking about. Of course they will find a way to blow it. With 16 seconds left, the puck goes to Montador at the point, he throws it at the net, which no Leaf attempts to block (see the pattern here?). The puck bounces of Derek Roy, it bounces off Schenn, it then lands right on an open Jochen Hecht's stick where he jams it home with 14 seconds left. Well, fuck.

Nothing to note in overtime so we're off to the shoot out. While the Leafs are historically garbage in the shoot out, I had high hopes because we're facing a rookie goalie in his first career shoot out. There's no way we don't leave him looking for his jock strap. First up is Versteeg. In his attempt, he pulled off a shoot out move used by many Leafs in the past. He fired it right at Enroth's pads. Nice to see him carry on tradition. Kessel got robbed on another shot and John Mitchell scores on the end of a beautiful dangle. Luckily Vanek was the only one to score for Buffalo so we're going to extras.

The fourth shooter is Clarke MacArthur. The Clarke MacArthur who going into this game is a career 0 for 8 in the shoot out. I don't get it. Was it Cito Gaston appreciation night at the ACC? I simply didn't get what Wilson was thinking when Kulemin and Grabovski, who both have had a heck of a game, were still available. MacArthur, who saw what would and wouldn't work, decided to go with what wouldn't work, doing the exact same thing Versteeg did. For the fifth shooter, Wilson puts out another head scratcher in Tomas Kaberle. He gets stopped, Tyler Ennis doesn't. Game. Set. Match.

We lose a very ugly and very winnable game. I just wish there was one of these to be taken to make last night go away.

This Week In Hockey: Opening Week

2010-10-14T23:08:00.010-04:00

Hockey's back! It's been back for a good week now. There's definitely been a few surprises. Some pleasant (LEAFS!!!1) and some just downright hilarious. In case you're still catching up with your hockey news, don't fret. I got ya.

Oct 7 - Opening Night

Leafs beat the Habs. Leafs fans everywhere breathes a sigh of relief as they won't go winless in their first eight games this season.
Jordan Eberle scores his first goal and it's a beauty.

Oct 8

Ondrej Pavelec collapses on the ice for no apparent reason. Doctors are still running tests to determine what was wrong. Isn't it obvious? Dude's playing in his fourth season in Atlanta...

Oct 9

Leafs beat up on the Sens. Toronto media jokes about Leafs fans planning the parade. Where do they come up with such original material?
John Tavares gets blindsided and is out with a concussion. That loud thud you hear isn't the sound of Tavares hitting the ice, it's the sound of Islanders' fans hopes and dreams being shattered.
Derek Stepan scores a hat trick in his first NHL game. I have the feeling that this might be the highlight of his career.
Brodeur puts up a Toskalian effort and gets chased from the net, allowing 5 goals on 20 shots.

Oct 10

Tyler Seguin scores his first goal after a great over the shoulder catch. Toronto will certainly regret trading that pick. The Argos could definitely use a receiver with those hands.

Oct 11

James Wisniewski shows Sean Avery how he brushes his back molars. The league suspends him two games for his insensitive actions. C'mon James, total low blow! Hockey players don't have teeth.
Niklas Hjalmarsson lays out Jason Pominville on a very borderline hit. The biggest crime is that Hjalmarsson's name has a H and a J consecutively. That shouldn't be allowed in any language!
The New Jersey Devils are victims of salary cap mismanagement once again. They send out 15 skaters due to injuries and suspensions. Luckily it was a home game so nobody was there to witness it.

Oct 12

Kirk Maltby retires. I didn't realize he was still playing after the lock out. His combined -34 since then might have something to do with that.

Oct 13

3 and 0, baby! We're sitting on top and enjoying the view.
Patrick Kaleta is a bit of a douchenozzle but that's really nothing new.
Maxim Lapierre hits Steve Downie from behind into the boards. It's hard to believe that it's only been three games into the season because Lapierre's cheapshots are already in mid-season form.

Oct 14

Mike Modano returns to Dallas and is greeted by a standing ovation. Simon Gagne returns to Philadelphia and is greeted by being pelted with dead batteries.

Perception vs Reality: Platinum Seats

2010-09-28T23:27:00.001-04:00

*This post is coming a week late but the motivation just isn't there when you lose a game to the Sens by a score of 5-0.

A couple of months ago, on an early summer's day, the Leafs announced that they were giving out chances to win tickets to the Coke Zero Fans First game. I was working downtown and knew they were at Much Music so I took the early GO train and made an attempt to line up for whatever they would be doing. The line wasn't too long but the planners were adamant on starting at 8:30 am sharp. With a half hour to go, the humidex close to 40C and Sens_Sucks a few feet away from me, I couldn't wait for the line to start moving.

The hockey gods must have heard my silent prayers because ten minutes later and one of the Coke dudes started handing out complimentary tickets.

SWEET MOTHER OF JESUS!!!

SEATS RIGHT UP AGAINST THE GLASS! This will probably be the only time I will ever be able to catch a game in the first row without selling a kidney. I've dreamt of this many times but never thought it would happen. Now the only thing standing between me and the game is father time.

As I got to the ACC, I looked around for the entrance to the platinums but couldn't find one. Turns out that there's some secret entrance behind the stairs to the upper levels. While walking down those steps and into the dimly lit corridor, I felt like Ray Liotta in Goodfellas. This is what it's like to be a gangster (or a wealthy businessman). I put down my beer, took my seat and waited for our heroes to take the ice.

Enter Sandman starts booming from the speakers, Andy Frost's voice greets the crowd, the gates open and Gustavsson is leading the way. Oh shit, it's about to begin! Let's see if a game in the platinums are all it's cracked up to be.

Perception: I'm so close as you can get, without being in the same booth as Pierre McGuire. I will literally be able to smell the players' blood and sweat!

Reality: Despite it being a free "Fans' first" game, the lady beside me made sure I got an authentic experience by ordering sushi so all I smelled was raw fish and wasabi.

Perception: I'm right up against the glass! I can't get any closer to the action. The view must be impeccable.

Reality: WTF, ref?! Get the fuck out of the way! My seats were right by the blue line and I was blocked out of the play any time the puck was in the zone for an extended period of time.

Perception: So we have periods one and three in the Leafs end. That's okay, our D should be much improved this year. Dion's leadership will provide direction and I'm sure Komisarek and Beauchemin will be way better than they were last year. I can't wait to see that up close.

Reality: Komisarek and Beauchemin didn't play, I saw Nick Foligno blow by Dion Phaneuf and I got real close to the Leafs defence...when they were sitting in the box serving a penalty.

Perception: At least I will get to see the Leafs' offence up close in the second period. I can't wait to see how Versteeg will fit into the picture. He will provide some much needed secondary scoring. Also, KADRI!!!1

Reality: 0-6 on the powerplay in the second period including two 5 on 3's!

Perception: With TIFF finishing up, I'm sure I'll catch some celebrities in the platinums too!

Reality: I had to squint my eyes to see a group of Raptors players across the ice from me...I only found out their names from Demar DeRozan's tweet...and then I had to use google to see who on the Raptors was named "Joey"...

Perception: It's a preseason game, I don't give a damn if we win but I can't wait until we score a goal so I can bang on that glass!

Reality: We get shut out 5-0 and the loudest ovation that night came when Wendel Clark made an appearance.

I don't know if I can say that sitting against the glass have met my expectations. Platinum seats are great as an experience but they definitely aren't the best seats in the house. When the puck was in my zone, the linesman stood right in front of me, and when the puck was in the other end, I had to crank my neck until it cramped just to get a glimpse of the action. If wealthy Bay street brokers want to pay ridiculous amounts of money to sit so close, then good on them. I definitely wouldn't recommend these seats to the hardcore fans. I think I'll stick to the upper bowl where I can see the whole rink. Perhaps if the Leafs put up more of an effort and won, I might have changed my mind about the seats. I doubt it though, I've always been a glass is half empty kind of guy.

7 Things Leafs Fans Will Watch For

2010-09-20T20:41:00.007-04:00

Allow me to reintroduce myself, my name is Hungry,

H to the L-F, I used to write blogs about fake refs...

I was going to head to the gym today but decided to dust off the ol' blogspot instead. It's been a long while since I've written anything on here and even a longer while since I've written anything worth reading. Hopefully that will change. The more content part. No guarantees about it being worth reading.

With the hockey season about to start, I figured it would be a great time to get things rolling again. While majority of the team we saw in April is still here, there has been a few key moves in the offseason. In case you weren't paying attention to hockey during the summer, here is a guide with seven things Leafs fans will be keeping an eye on during the new 2010-11 season.

#1 Tomas Kaberle

The big Leafs news...or non-news during the offseason was who we would be getting in return for our favourite Czech, Tomas Kaberle. As I'm sure we all know, Tomas is staying in TO for at least one more year, assuming that he doesn't waive his NTC. Kaberle flew out of the gates last year, scoring 35 points in his first 41 games. Unfortunately, he couldn't keep up his hot start and only notched 14 points in his last 41 games. He still finished with a very respectable 49 points, good for 8th in points by defencemen in the league, but also had a dismal -16 to accompany it.

Tomas have stated a number of times that he wants to remain a Leaf for life but with all the drama he has been through over the past year, I wouldn't blame him if he left. While is future is cloudy in Toronto, there is one thing that is certain. Whether he plays well or puts up horrendous numbers; whether he waives his NTC or stands pat; whether he re-signs or flees in the summer, people will be watching, people will be judging.

#2 Sensationalized Headlines

Oh look! The puck hasn't even dropped yet and it has already begun. But wait, you say. This is merely a play on words signalling the emergence of Kadri's two-way play!

You're giving them too much credit. This is the Toronto media after all.

#3 New Additions

The most notable additions Burke brought in during the summer are Kris Versteeg, Colby Armstrong and Clarke MacArthur.

Versteeg is a welcome addition as he should take some pressure off Phil Kessel by providing some much needed secondary scoring. It also never hurts to bring in a Stanley Cup winner. We'll see if he can shine when he's not overshadowed by Toews and Kane.

At $3M a season, Colby Armstrong will have to put up some career numbers to justify his salary. While I don't see him doing that, I do see him winning the fans over with some hard-nosed hockey. I'm hoping we get a Darcy Tucker like effort from Colby, minus the crazy.

We might be overpaying for Armstrong but MacArthur comes at a steal at $1.1M. Since it's a one year deal, MacArthur will definitely be looking to put up some numbers for a pay raise. Given he get put into the right situation, he should be able to pot a career high in goals.

#4 Sophomore Slumps

The dreaded sophomore slump. Many have fallen victim to it but few can explain why.

Can Bozak continue to shine and turn Kessel into a 40 goal guy? Can Gunnarson continue his steady play which saw him with a team leading +8? Can Gustavsson continue where he left off, winning 7 out of 10 while posting a .915 save percentage? With three sophomores looking to play pivotal roles on next year's team, Leafs fans everywhere are hoping that they don't get hit by this phenomenon.

#5 Second Year Leafs

We move from second year NHLers to second year Leafs. With only a handful of players remaining from the JFJ era, most or our team are first or second year Leafs. While many are depth players, there are a few we will be watching to see if they can carry the team on their shoulders. Can Phaneuf handle the pressure that comes with being the first Leafs captain since Mats? Will Komisarek and Beauchemin find their game in a Leafs uniform and prove that last year was simply a bad fluke season? Can Sjostrom bolster the PK and lead us out of our 30th place ranking? Can Kessel keep lighting the lamp? I'm hoping the answer is yes to all of those questions.

#6 Rookies

With a 29th place finish last year, the returning vet's places in the line ups are all but secured. Kadri, D'Amigo, Rynnas and Stefanovich might be four rookies for Leafs fans and veteran players low on the depth chart to keep an eye on this year.

We all know about Kadri. He's the Leafs blue chip, our second saviour. Will he play his way on to the big club or will he start with the Marlies? The Leafs doesn't want to rush his development but they want to see if he has what it takes to play at the top level too. No matter what league he plays in, Leafs fans will definitely have an eye on him this season.

Jerry D'Amigo's most famous goal to date was one that crushed another team with a Maple Leaf on their chest. If he can provide that kind of clutch play for our Leafs, all will be forgiven.

With Giguere coming off the books after this season, the Leafs will need somebody to step into his spot. The goalie prospect most are hyped about right now is the 6'5 Jussi Rynnas. He will almost certainly start off with the Marlies but could be the next in line to join the big club. Much like Gustavsson last year, Rynnas will have to get accustomed to the North American game. While that may lead to a rough start, he is still somebody Leafs fans will want to pay close attention to.

Mikhail Stefanovich is a bit of a question mark. Many thought he might make some noise with the team last year but a poor preseason put an end to those ideas. He had a mediocre season in the Q last year and as a result, he's flying a bit under the radar. Hopefully he can find that scorer's touch which helped him net 49 goals in the Q two years ago.

#7...

I hate to say it, but whether we like it or not, many Leafs fans will have an eye on...

Small Victories

2010-04-28T08:46:00.005-04:00

Despite:

Shaun Marcum pitching great but the bullpen throwing shitballs
Kevin Gregg walking in the winning run on 4 pitches
Randy Ruiz not being freed
Francona not putting in Papelbon for the save (I have him on my fantasy team...don't judge me!)
and spending $10.25 for a tallboy of Keith's

I left last night's game with a smile on my face because during the middle of the ninth, a father and son a section over saw my sign, gave me a thumbs up and chanted down to Cito to free Ruiz. Small victories.

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly - White Sox vs Jays Edition

2010-04-14T00:48:00.007-04:00

Back from the Jays game. Just a quick run down of the good, the bad and the ugly I witnessed at the dome today.

The Good

Ricky Romero - RR Cool Jay was lights out in his second start of the season, striking out a career high 12 batters in 8 innings. With only one hit allowed, it was easily the most impressive start of young Romero's career. Gems like today's game makes us all forget about Troy Tulowitzki and trading away Roy Halla...okay, maybe not.

The Bullpen - Sure, they only pitched one inning but it was an important one as Kevin Gregg got the job done without allowing a runner on base. Faith in the bullpen has once again been restored. Now the question is, should Frasor still keep his job as closer?

Melons - Props to the girl who lifted her shirt on the jumbotron during the 8th inning. Sure, she had a bra underneath but I won't complain. Also, was today D-Cup night at the dome or something because the ladies sitting in and around our section appeared to be extra busty tonight.

Luchadore - Shout out to the dude sitting behind me with the luchadore mask. I really don't have much to say other than keep being awesome.

The Bad

The Klansmen - There were 4 guys in the 500s who wore white hazard suits or something which had a faint outline of "JAYS" on their suits. The letters were so faint that you couldn't see them from far. They just looked like white hooded suits...

AJ Piershitski - Faked getting hit by a pitch in the 8th right before Rios belted a home run...the only hit Romero gave up. Who knows what would have happened if the umps didn't mess up the call. Actually, I do. Pierzynski would have struck out swinging like he did the two other times he was up.

Booing Alex Rios - Personally, I don't see what the booing is all about. Rios was never good enough for me to be bitter about his departure. It's not like he has become the 5-tool guy we've always wanted him to be with the White Sox. I'm going to credit his home run to karma!

Furry Vengeance - The advertisements were all over the ball park. I can't believe a movie with the title "Furry Vengeance" is G-rated.

Man who packs dinner to the game - Dude in front of me brought a whole meal to the game. His main course was some home made lasagne, followed by some green olives and topped off with some honey roasted peanuts. It was more weird than bad but olives are gross. EWWW

The Ugly

Lyle Overbay - After today's one for four performance, Overbay raised his batting average to .100. It's no wonder that seven of Vernon's ten hits has been for extra bases. He knows that with Overbay stepping up to the plate after him, there's no way he's advancing along the basepaths.

Random Sports Jerseys - What is it about sporting events that makes people think they can get away with wearing random sports jerseys to them? I saw a Barry Bonds jersey, an A-Rod jersey, a number of Raptors jerseys, a number of Leafs jerseys, a couple of Team Canada hockey/baseball jerseys and a Colin Doyle Toronto Rock jersey. Though to be fair, that could very well be Colin Doyle sporting his own jersey. I wouldn't know because I don't know what Colin Doyle looks like.

The group of Jersey Shore stand-ins behind me - There were a group of 5-6 Ed Hardy/Affliction wearing douchebags with their guidette girlfriends. This probably explains the bustiness in my section but man, were those broads annoying. From the 3rd inning on, I kept hearing them talking about how Amanda and Tamara got into a big fight and that they don't think Amanda will be coming back. I was hoping Amanda would come back so I could record that scrap and put it on youtube. Unfortunately, she never did, making a loser out of everybody within earshot of them.

The Second Team

2010-04-10T21:58:00.005-04:00

Tonight's Leafs win against the Habs marks the end of another dismal season. It will be the fifth straight season without making the playoffs...sixth straight if you count the lock out year. Without a team to cheer for in the playoffs, I find that many people adopt a second team. Most will just cheer for any remaining Canadian team left. This is a thought process I simply cannot fathom. How can anybody call them self a Leafs fan if they would even consider rooting for the Habs or Sens? Anybody who admits to doing so should get their fandom revoked. Luckily there is still another Canadian team to cheer for come mid April.

THE AL EAST LEADING BLUE JAYS!!!

Truc Life?

2010-03-10T23:50:00.001-05:00

First and foremost, I'm sorry for the lack of posts. Only three posts in the month of February?...I'll blame it on the short month! In reality, I've just been busy with work. They have implemented these new "enhancements" which, to my understanding, are supposed to improve things but instead they have made my job a living hell. This is no different from the enhancements that Burke has brought to the Leafs this season. Did anybody really expect the Leafs to be this bad? Prior to the start of the season most experts, bloggers and hockey fans all over had them pegged as a team fighting for the playoffs instead of a team fighting to get out of the basement.

The biggest change Burke made to this year's edition of the Leafs were to inject them with truculence. Leafs bloggers latched on to this word harder than a hungry baby would to a tit and why wouldn't they? Burke won a Stanley Cup with a truculent team! To illustrate just how infatuated we were with truculence, some of us were excited over having Garnet Exelby as a third pairing defenceman because of videos like this.

Sporting a 21-33-12 record through 66 games, I think it's fair to ask the question "Is truculence overrated?" (Obviously) To answer this, I took a look at the games we played this season. Through 66 games played:

29 of them had at least a fight. Our win/loss record in those games is 8-21 (.275 Winning %)
We had more penalty minutes than our opposition in 26 of those games. Our win/loss record in those games is 6-20 (.231 Winning %)
16 of those games featured a fight(s) while we lead in penalty minutes. Our record in those games is 3-13 (.188 Winning %)
In the 27 games where there the opposition had more penalty minutes and didn't feature any fights, our record is 11-16 (.407 Winning %)

Obviously there are many factors that I didn't account for like when the fight started (Was it within the first 5 minutes of the game? Was it during a blow out?); how the fight started (Planned fight off the draw? Coming to the aid of a team mate?) and who won the fight, but my half-assed analysis shows that 1) The Leafs aren't very good 2) I'm lazy and 3) Skill > Truculence!*

*Outcome of games played may have differed greatly if Vesa Toskala didn't suit up for 26 games

Olympic Contest Winner!

2010-02-28T22:41:00.003-05:00

With the Olympics over and done with, it's time to tally up the points to see who was the winner of the contest!

E Daniel Clark: 11 Points
Leafies: 12 Points
Skinnyfish: 13 Points
Rich: 16 Points
Sleza: 17 Points
Kessticle: 17 Points
Will: 19 Points
Shield: 23 Points
MykeNose: 23 Points
Gooner4Ever: 24 Points
Space Weed: 24 Points
Fleet Fox: 25 Points

Congrats to Fleet Fox for owning the podium!
Shoot me an email at dennis0430 at gmail dot com to claim your prize

Thankfully, no tie-breaker was needed.

What I learned from the contest

Joe Thornton is in true playoff form, scoring 2 points in 7 games
The top 2 scorers were Marian Hossa and Pavol Demitra and nobody picked them. No respect for the Slovaks!
The only goose-egg pick was Lidstrom who didn't register a point in 4 games
Niklas Hagman is the highest scoring Finn. Now you can't say he's never done anything for the Finns, sleza!
Remember that offensive dynamo team from Russia? They only had one player in the top 30...
Canadians led the way with 13 players in the top 30, followed by Slovakia with 6 then the US with 4.
I LOOOVE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLD!!!1

Olympics Contest Reminder

2010-02-03T09:12:00.004-05:00

Just a reminder that there's a week left until the Olympics so that means only a week left until the Olympics contest. Leave your entries in the comments! Here are the rules once again.

------------------------------OLYMPICS CONTEST------------------------------Now for a new contest. With the Olympics coming up, I figured an Olympics themed one would make most sense. To keep it quick and simple, list 3 forwards and 2 defencemen playing in the Olympics. Person with the most points wins.

To avoid having Malkin, Crosby and Ovechkin as everybody's 3 forwards, they are void from the contest. Everybody else is fair game. For a tie-breaker, state who you think will lead the Olympics in points along with how many goals and assists they get. Remember to leave your name rather than anonymous along with some way I can contact you in case you win.

Winner gets this Tomas Kaberle autograph.

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

2010-02-01T22:28:00.012-05:00

Ladies and gentlemen, the Burke era is officially here. There was no holding back, he came out guns blazing. These are the type of deals that us Leafs fans have only heard of...the deals we were expecting last trade deadline and this past draft. While we came away disappointed on both those occasions, he really made our heads turn with this one.

Like everybody else, I was completely caught off guard by the news of these deals. I stayed up until the morning watching Federer do his thing so I was still in bed when the trades went down. It was around 11:30. I feel a slight vibration (get your mind out of the gutter, you perv) and my eyes slowly opened. I just got a text message from my buddy and it read "Brian Burke is a genius!" I sprung out of bed and turned on my computer. Twitter was blowing up with activity. Who did we get? Who is gone? A day later and I can finally wrap my head around this. Sure, there's a lot of good in these two deals but like with most things, there's some bad and some ugly too.

The Good

Elisha Cuthbert - One of the key components to this trade. The one edge Ottawa has had on us was the celebrity girlfriend factor. This pretty much gives us the upper hand in the battle of Ontario.

Getting a competent goalie - Our biggest weakness this season has been our goaltending by far. With Giguere, we get a goalie that has taken his team to the Stanley Cup finals twice and came away with some hardware both times...even when he lost the series! Giguere's performance in the 2003 playoffs was one of the most clutch performances I have ever seen by a goalie. While it would be delusional to expect that same goaltender from the past, he is still miles above Toskala and at this very moment, probably a better choice than The Monster too.

The Kids Get to Play! - We lost a goalie (if you can call him that), a defenceman and four forwards. In return we got back a goalie, a defenceman and only one forward. That opens up three forwards spots! Come on down, Hanson and Stalberg!...unfortunately Wallin will probably be filling in that last spot.
Draft Schmaft - We essentially gave up two first round picks for Kessel and Phaneuf. Two players with star potential under the age of 25? I don't think too many GMs would shake their head at that
#1 Centre - We are giving Matt Stajan the chance to flourish into a #1 centre that we all knew he would someday be...with Calgary! /snickers
WE GOT SOMETHING OF VALUE FOR JASON BLAKE AND VESA TOSKALA!!! I NEVER THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD COME

The Bad

Moustachulence - Losing this epic moustache
High Risk - At $6.5M per season, Phaneuf is definitely a big risk. I know we all have our fingers crossed that he will not be the second coming of Bryan McCabe. Here's hoping that a change of scenery is what he needs to go back to his Norris candidate form.
More Defence? - With almost $23M invested in our d (not including Finger's terrible contract), it will be an embarrassment if we don't improve next season. The top four of Kaberle, Phaneuf, Beauchemin and Komisarek does make me giddy...but of course I said the same thing earlier this season but with Schenn instead of Phaneuf.
Hope - Okay, this is normally a good thing but not when you thought everybody else was giving up on this team and you wanted to get good tickets for cheap! With this new found hope, fans will be filling the seats to see Phaneuf in action. Thanks, Burke!

Piritta Hannula -Or Niklas Hagman's wife as you probably know her. Sure, we get Elisha Cuthbert but I have to admit that I'm a bigger fan of Hagman's wife. Especially since she's not tainted by Sean Avery. Oh, Piritta. You will be missed.

The Ugly

DION PHANEUF
DA DAAAAAAA DA-DA-DA
DION PHANEUF
DA DA-DA DA

There is no denying that Dion Phaneuf is one of the ugliest human beings on this planet

One of these things do not belong in this picture
Motivation for ugly dudes. Get good in hockey. This is what $6.5M a year can nab you

The Muskoka Fiveheads
Dion's forehead compared with four other notoriously gargantuan foreheads.
Only Christina Ricci has him beat!

Inspired by words from our very own WAC
"He looks two steps behind on an evolution chart."
Looks like she nailed it

Olympic Contest + Contest Update

2010-01-24T15:04:00.001-05:00

If you haven't noticed, I have a "Track the Contest" link in the bar to the right. Now for those who missed the train, it was basically a Leafs contest I held before the season started asking some over/under, true or false and fill in the blank questions. Here's an update on that contest.

Over/Unders
1. Over/Under on the number of goals Jason Blake will score: 24.5
Actual goals: 10 // Projected goals: 15 - Yeah, the under it looking pretty safe.

2. Over/Under on the number of fighting majors Luke Schenn will get: 4.5
Actual fights: 3 // Projected fights: 5 - This one looks like it's going down to the wire.

3. Over/Under on the number of points Jiri Tlusty will get: 50.5
Actual Points (as a Leaf): 0 // Projected points: 0 - I HAD FAITH IN YOU!!!

4. Over/Under on the number of wins The Monster will get: 19.5
Actual Wins: 9 // Projected wins: 14 - Ugh...this one was totally reachable if it wasn't for two heart ablations, one sore groin and Ron Wilson's overplaying of ToskaLOL

5. Over/Under on the number of goals for this team will score: 239.5
Actual goals: 139 // Projected goals: 215 - With the Leafs' PP going cold and Kessel no longer scoring at a point per game place, it looks like this one will stay under

True or false
1. We will make the playoffs.
11 points out...it's still possible but it doesn't look good.

2. We will finish above the dirty Habs.
With the 8th place team being the Habs, this one doesn't look good either

3. Mike van Ryn will not get put on injured reserve this year. Technically true since he never really came off the IR but the fair answer would be false. 4. The Monster will outplay Toskala for the starting job.
Though Gustavsson hasn't been amazing, this is still without a question, true.

5. Our penalty killing will be in the top 10 at season's end.
With a revamped defence and a "healthy" Toskala/new goaltender in The Monster, I figured there would be a huge improvement on the PK. Unfortunately we are the worst team in the NHL defensively and our PK will go down as one of the worst, if not the worst, PKs in the history of the NHL.

Pick a Player
1. _______ will be the first person to get suspended.
Surprisingly, there hasn't been a suspension yet.

2. _______ will score the first goal of the season.
Alexei Ponikarovsky

3. _______ will be the first to be healthy scratched.
Matt Stajan & Niklas Hagman were the first "regulars" to ride the pine.

4. _______ will be the first to be traded.
Jiri Tlusty

5. _______ will lead the team in +/-
So far, Ian White at +4 but Schenn & Gunnarsson are right behind with +3

If the season finished with the projected stats then there will be a 3-way tie for winners: Ryan, Clark and Lordosis with Ryan taking the tie-breaker (November record).

------------------------------OLYMPIC CONTEST------------------------------

Now for a new contest. With the Olympics coming up, I figured an Olympics themed one would make most sense. To keep it quick and simple, list 3 forwards and 2 defencemen playing in the Olympics. Person with the most points wins.

To avoid having Malkin, Crosby and Ovechkin as everybody's 3 forwards, they are void from the contest. Everybody else is fair game. For a tie-breaker, state who you think will lead the Olympics in points along with how many goals and assists they get. Remember to leave your name rather than anonymous along with some way I can contact you in case you win.

Winner gets this Tomas Kaberle autograph.

The Best New Cheap Eats 2009 #6: Kenzo Ramen

2010-01-21T01:07:00.000-05:00

BlogTO recently put up a new "Best of..." list: The Best New Cheap Eats in Toronto 2009. Now the first thing I do when I see a new list is check out the map to see which ones are convenient for me to get to. Right away I picked out two that were walking distance from work; #14's Oh Boy Burger and #6's Kenzo Ramen. Since Kenzo Ramen was a little closer, we decided to check them out last Friday.

The Poor Man's Best Friend

When I think ramen, the word cheap definitely comes to mind. My grandparents owned a convenience store when I was young and they told me a story of this customer who only had $3 and 3 days until his next paycheque. He ended up buying his meals for those 3 days. $3 worth of instant ramen!

Now there's nothing wrong with instant ramen (except for the fact that it's loaded with sodium and MSG!). It's easy to make, inexpensive and quite frankly, pretty delicious. That said, if I was going to a ramen restaurant, I expected them to blow those $0.50 packages away. Let's see how they fared.

The King of the Kings Ramen

Location: 4/5

Kenzo Ramen is at 138 Dundas St. W which is right by Dundas and Elizabeth. It's about a couple minutes away from the Eaton Centre and you really can't miss the Japanese decor on the outside. They have a big Japanese style wooden sign along with a Japanese banner at the front. I have actually walked past this place a few times and noticed the store front. I never bothered to actually look at it though as I just assumed it was yet another sushi restaurant. Now my friend told me she's been to the one uptown at Yonge and Steeles but after a quick google search, it looks like they just relocated downtown.

As for the actual restaurant; they decorate it with Japanese lanterns, Japanese cloth screens and Japanese art to give it an authentic Japanese feel...or at least that's what I would assume a restaurant in Japan would look like since I've never been to Japan. The kitchen is located at the back and there isn't a wall dividing it so you can see right into it from the dining area.

My only gripe with the restaurant is that it is too small! When we arrived, there was a small line up so in order to fit everybody in, we had to keep the door ajar. The waiter came over and asked if we could close the door. Well, I would if we could all fit! I would estimate that the seating capacity is around 25 people or so.

Taste: 4.5/5

I ordered "The King of the Kings Ramen" which seemed like one of their more popular items on the menu. My order came very quickly and I dove right in. The King of the Kings Ramen features ramen noodles of course, seaweed (dry and wet), bean sprouts, ground pork, slices of pork, green onions, a slice of fish paste cake (the white with the red swirl) and half of a hard boiled egg all in a spicy pork based soup.

The soup is what makes this meal. It had a decent kick to it and is similar to a Korean pork-bone soup. The slices of pork were very tender and flavourful. From where we sat, we could actually see the pork being slow cooked in their oven. The rest of the ingredients pretty much tasted the way you would imagine it tasting. The meal was delicious and I wasn't left dying of thirst like I normally would after a bowl of instant ramen.

Tacoyaki: A teriyaki taco?

As a side, I also split an order of Tacoyaki with my two co-workers. Despite the name, tacoyaki isn't a teriyaki taco. The menu said it was baked octopus. Having never tried octopus, I was curious as to what this would taste like. Upon getting the order, I noticed that they were topped with dried octopus, crushed herbs and mayonnaise. The balls were also very soft (that's what she said). It appears that they are balls of batter with a chunk of octopus inside it (think Chinese sweet and sour chicken balls but baked instead of deep fried). I picked one up with my chop sticks and took a bite. My first bite was all batter (which tasted like the batter from a deep fried banana) but I could see a chunk of octopus as well as melted cheese inside. After my second bite, the morsel of octopus was gone. It was chewy. The texture was very much like calamari but the taste was different. It had a stronger seafood taste. Similar to abalone. I'm not a huge fan of seafood so the next time, I will just stick to the pork dumplings as a side.

Value: 3.5/5

The King of the Kings Ramen was $9.95 before tax and tip. While delicious, it's a far cry from a couple packs of instant ramen which will probably cost a loonie and change. You do get a healthy serving but like most soup-based meals, I was hungry an hour later. There are definitely better lunch time deals to be had but if you are craving noodles then give Kenzo Ramen a try.

Verdict: 4 Yutaka Fukufujis out of 5

Kenzo Ramen specializes in ramen and their menu reflects that. They have a limited selection of no more than 20 items; most of which are noodles in soup. They even have a couple of Japanese beers and sake on the menu. The service is quick but they could work on being a little more friendly. I don't think I've seen a smile from either of the 2 waiters. The food itself is great though. The three of us really enjoyed our meal and would definitely eat there again. Since Kenzo Ramen was recently relocated downtown, I guess it isn't really a new place but it is still a restaurant worthy of paying a visit to.

Winners and Losers of the New Year

2010-01-17T00:10:00.001-05:00

The new year isn't even a month old and the sporting world has already seen it's fair share of ups and downs. Through these past two weeks we have seen a dog get put down, a spitting disgrace, an armed man in Washington and more. Let's check out some of the winners and losers of 2010 so far.

Winners

Jordan Eberle

Whether Eberle pans out as an NHL star or not is irrelevant. This kid is the definition of clutch and will hold the title as one of the best Canadian juniors to ever play in the tournament. It's a shame that Canada didn't end up beating the US in OT but Eberle's late-game heroics definitely made this a game to remember.

Aroldis Chapman

When I turned 22 I was fresh out of university and looking for a job. I would spend hours on facebook during the day and consume massive amounts of alcohol during the night. Aroldis Chapman, on the other hand, became a multi-millionaire by signing a ridiculous $30 million, 6 year contract with the Cincinnati Reds. I'm curious to see how his career will pan out. He has the heat but not quite the location yet. A part of me is happy that the Jays got outbid because he truly is a crapshoot but the other part of me is bitter and hopes he turns out to be nothing but a Brandon League. No matter the outcome, he's got 30 million reasons to smile right now.

Ben Henderson

Down two rounds in a five round title-unification fight? No problem. Bendo comes out hungry in the 3rd and turns a Jamie Varner shot into a guillotine choke that had him tapping in seconds. In my opinion, these flash finishes are what makes mixed martial arts such a great sport.

Viewers of the Packers/Cardinals game

I find that as the years go on, my interest in the NFL goes with it. Admittedly, I think I've only seen two or three complete games this year. I don't know what it is...maybe it's the fact that I don't really have a team I'm fully committed to or maybe the one team I usually cheer for (The Bears) sucked ass. Regardless of the reason, this is the game that could suck me back in. The highest scoring game in NFL playoff history featured 9 combined aerial touchdowns, 3 combined rushing touchdowns, a defensive touchdown to win the game and only 2 combined punts! Fans, hell, even non-football fans were in for a treat.

Curtis Joseph

Curtis Joseph ended a storied career on Jan 12, 2010. After a dismal 2008-09 season with the Leafs, he has finally decided to hang them up. I guess he didn't want the lone spot as the goalie with the most losses in the NHL. Instead, he will share that feat with Gump Worsley. Don't let that define his career though. Cujo signed with St. Louis as a 20 year-old free agent and ended up being the fourth winningest goaltender of all time. While some will bring up the no Stanley Cups argument, I personally believe that Joseph belongs in the Hall.

Losers

Clippers Fans

I don't understand how one city can have two teams that are so far apart in terms of skill. On one side you have the Lakers, a team that has won 10 championships since its 49 years of existence. On the other side you have the Clippers, a team that has only two winning seasons in its 25 years of existence. So these Clippers are perennial losers, what's different this year? Well, aside from another losing season, they had to evacuate their whole stadium due to a false fire alarm and they also found out that Blake Griffin, their first overall pick from the draft, will be out for the whole season. Yes, it does suck to be a Leafs fan but things could be worse...you could be a Clippers fan. I assume that there's nobody with an allegiance to both teams because you would have offed yourself by now.

The BBWAA

It's a shame that one of, if not the greatest second baseman to ever play the game won't get in first ballot because a group of writers wanted to send a message. That's the only explanation, really, to omit Alomar from the hall of fame induction this year. I really think that the baseball hall of fame should be decided by a committee that has actually played the game. Hang your head, Baseball Writers Association of America...

The Leafs Penalty Killing

You know that saying that goes "It's like a train wreck, you just can't help but watch." Well the Leafs PK is just as terrible as a train wreck but I sure as hell can't stomach to watch it. They are a torrid 18 for 30 on the penalty kill in the month of January and the month isn't even over yet. That's an embarrassing 60%! Even worse than their record low 68.6%! I have never missed baseball so much.

Jake Allen

This will go down as one of the biggest Toskala-esque performances in the World Juniors by a Canadian goalie. I haven't seen anything fold under pressure so badly since Loser Domi's Mrs. Tavares shirt.

Junior Seau

Junior Seau called it quits...again. His fourth retirement in his last four seasons! If the Pats make another deep run next year, I wouldn't be surprised to see him come back. Heck, what if the Chargers are going for 16-0, will he come out and join them too? I have absolutely no respect for this coat-tail rider especially after he came back from retirement with The Patriots four days after he signed a one-day contract with the Chargers for a sentimental retirement.

Gilbert Arenas

Oh Gil...where did we go wrong? While the stories keep changing, one thing remains the same. He kept guns in the locker room. Now I don't know if he pointed them at Javaris Crittenton or not but we wouldn't even be talking about this if he had just kept them at home. The real winners in the story would be the Washington Wizards. They owed the under-achieving, injury-prone point guard something like $80-90 million over the next four years. This incident gives them an opportunity to void the rest of the contract due to a breach in the morality clause. So long, Agent Zero.

Shinya Aoki

MMA is a growing sport in North America but it's huge in Japan. While Shinya Aoki might not be a household name amongst North American fans, this definitely put him on the map. Fields Dynamite!! 2009 was an event held on new years eve. It pitted two promotions against each other; Pride vs Sengoku. With each promotion having won four bouts each, it came down to the tie-breaker. The world number two lightweight from Pride, Shinya Aoki vs Sengoku's Mizuto Hirota. Aoki controlled the match from the start. He got an early take down and never let up. He eventually got an arm trapped behind Hirota's back and applied a hammerlock (like what a cop would do on a take down). Hirota's arm gets cranked in a way that would make most people squeamish but still doesn't tap. Aoki's had enough and snaps it. Okay, pretty awesome right? I would have this as a winner if it stopped right there. But it didn't. Aoki gets up and flips off Hirota while he's lying there screaming with his arm broken, then gets up and does that soccer airplane celebration, then flips off other members of the crowd before pointing to his elbow and mocking Hirota some more.

Video footage, not for the faint of heart

Mark McGwire

So Mark McGwire finally comes out and reveals to everybody a big secret that we all already knew. Is this going to increase his chances of making it into the hall? I don't know. Personally, I don't think it should. When everybody suspected him of being a cheater, he couldn't get in and now that everybody knows he was a cheater, he definitely should not be allowed in.

Mid-season Report Cards

2010-01-08T00:40:00.000-05:00

Okay so it's a bit past mid-season and if I could forget the past few games, I totally would...but I can't, so here are my mid-season and three games grades.

Forwards

Phil Kessel

32 GP / 14 G / 8 A / 22 PTS / -2

Kessel is still by far the most talented player on this team. If it wasn't for his hot start, we might be battling Carolina for last. Instead, we are battling the Flyers, Thrashers, Lightning and Panthers for second last. Kessel was off to a blazing start with his new club and scored at pretty much a point a game pace. Unfortunately, the last 10 games happened where he's only gotten 1 point in that stretch. He can definitely make things happen but he has to play stronger with the puck. Brian Burke, please get him an elite centre!

Grade: B+

Matt Stajan

43 GP / 11 G / 21 A / 32 PTs / -2

Matt Stajan is not a number one centre...but with the depth we have up the middle, he's probably the closest thing we have. Most of his points came during Kessel's hot stretch and when Kessel cooled off, so did he; only notching 4 points in the last 10. While he is on pace to record career highs in his offensive totals, his career highs weren't all that impressive to begin with.

Grade: C+

Niklas Hagman

43 GP / 16 G / 11 A / 27 PTS / -1

While there are a ton of things I like about Hagman's game, I expected more from him in terms of his offensive numbers. He's a streaky scorer, notching 13 points in 12 games beginning late November. Since then, he has only gotten 3 points in his next 12. For the past couple of games he has seen fourth line minutes. As one of the veteran forwards on this team, I would like to see him respond to his demotion but driving hard to the net and doing anything to get the puck over the goal line.

Grade: C

Jason Blake

44 GP / 10 G / 15 A / 25 PTS / -1

Jason Blake was horrible to start the year. It took him 27 games to score his 3rd and 4th goals. He has picked things up slightly since then but still not good enough to be a factor most nights. While he will never earn that $4.5 million, he could still be a decent hockey player (as we saw last year). Only 2 more seasons after this one!...

Grade: D+

Mikhael Grabovski

42 GP / 7 G / 18 A / 25 PTS / -1

Like most, I was expecting a break out season for Grabovski. I wasn't looking for a point a game or anything but I didn't think 60 points would be out of the question. Unfortunately, with him being out for the next 6 weeks, it doesn't look like it will happen. Didn't look like it would happen regardless though. His play has been streaky and I would even say he looked disinterested some nights. I blame the peace treaty between him and the Kostitsyns! We want crazy Grabs!

Grade: C-

Lee Stempniak

44 GP / 11 G / 12 A / 23 PTS / -5

I was actually surprised by Stempniak's points total when I checked out his stats. I thought he would have more. I guess this speaks well for him because I actually notice him this season. He's been one of the better Leafs forwards, in my opinion. His play has gotten him some good chances but he just hasn't been able to capitalize on all of them. I do hope that he regains his scoring touch that he had in St. Louis where he scored 27 goals in his sophomore season.

Grade: B-

Nikolai Kulemin

40 GP / 7 G / 7 A /14 PTS / -2

Kulemin is what I would consider a no stats all-star. Well, all-star might be a bit of a stretch but you get the gist of what I'm saying. He's been physical, he back checks and he takes a hit to make a play. When I first heard he was coming over from Russia and played on the same line as Malkin, I figured he would be a one dimensional scorer. Thankfully he isn't...but I would like to see more of that scoring dimension!

Grade: B

Alexei Ponikarovsky

44 GP / 15 G / 14 A / 29 PTS / +4

Poni had a great season last year and I was really hoping to see him build on that. With higher expectations over his head he hasn't really delivered. I would like to see Poni use his size and play more assertively. He has the frame to drive to the net and when he does, good things usually happen. With a team full of negatives, it's nice to finally see a plus player. With 4 points in his last 5, it certainly isn't too late to turn things around. It's a contract year, Poni. Show us what you got!

Grade: C

Colton Orr

44 GP / 1 G / 2 A / 3 PTS / -3 / 86 PIM Orr's been fantastic. I love watching him fight and he doesn't really hurt the team much either. He doesn't take a ton of bad penalties unlike a lot of enforcers/pests and he's a tremendous forechecker. He also scored a goal! That's one more than Rickard Wallin...

Grade: B+

Jamal Mayers

32 GP / 1 G / 4 A / 5 PTS / -3

Mayers is one of those players that I can't quite figure out. What is his purpose? Why is he playing? Can we get our 5th pick back? While I do enjoy watching him throw down, I would much rather give a kid like Christian Hanson a chance with the big club than to dress Mayers.

Grade: D+

Wayne Primeau

35 GP / 2 G / 3 A / 5 PTS / +1

Another plus player on this team! Primeau has been a solid addition to the team. He won't light the world on fire with his game but he's all you can ask for from a 4th liner. That said, if I could trade him for Stralman, I would.

Grade: B

Viktor Stalberg

14 GP / 2 G / 1 A / 3 PTS / -3

Here's a player Leafs Nation fell in love with during the pre-season. This pretty much shows you that the games played before 1-82 doesn't mean a thing. While Stalberg tore up the pre-season, his regular season stats to start the year was less than impressive, registering a lone assist in 8 games. On his current stint with the Leafs, he's scored 2 goals in 6. While an improvement, still not enough to draw the ooh's and ahh's he did in September. I have no doubt that Stalberg will be quite the player someday. We'll just have to wait patiently for that day to come.

Grade: C

John Mitchell

24 GP / 2 G / 7 A / 9 PTS / -6

In my opinion, John Mitchell will forever be a fringe NHL third liner. While he has decent hands, he doesn't seem to possess the shot to finish. Being injured for close to 20 games does set him back a bit but I can't say my expectations for Mitchell were too high anyway.

Grade: C

Rickard Wallin

32 GP / 0 G / 3 A / 3 PTS / -6

Did Wallin really bring Gustavsson over? If I remember correctly, The Monster was signed before Wallin. So what purpose does he bring to the table? Through half a season, I honestly can't think of a single reason why he is still on the team. You know you're terrible when Colton Orr is outscoring you.

Grade: F

Defence

Tomas Kaberle

44 GP / 4 G / 34 A / 38 PTS / -7

Kaberle's never been much of a defender but he's having a blistering season offensively. He leads the team in points and is second in the league in scoring for defencemen. While that -7 is an ugly number, I have to give it to him for his consistent offensive output. I wouldn't be surprised to see him moved at the deadline though. Especially if a package included a much needed first round pick.

Grade: A-

Mike Komisarek

34 GP / 0 G / 4 A / 4 PTS / -9

Komisarek was one of two big free agent defencemen brought in and the pressure to perform seemed to have gotten to him as he started the season pretty poorly. He played overly aggressive and was a negative most nights. His game has settled down a bit since but still not quite the in-your-face defender that I hated playing against when he was on the Habs.

Grade: C+

Francois Beauchemin

44 GP / 4 G / 15 A / 19 PTS / -8

The second big free agent signing was another disappointment to start the season. Beauchemin was at one point a season low -13 but playing that many games with Toskala in net doesn't help. He has definitely picked his game up on both the defensive and offensive ends though and I'm certain he will continue his strong play in the second half.

Grade: B

Ian White

44 GP / 8 G / 14 A / 22 PTS / +7

How does a team with every defenceman in the negatives have one that is +7?! Over the past season and a half, Ian White has shown how valuable he really is. He puts up decent offensive numbers and plays sound positional defence. While he isn't the biggest guy on the ice, he is quick with his stick and doesn't leave his man alone too often. Re-sign Ian White!

Grade: A+

Luke Schenn

41 GP / 1 G / 4 A / 5 PTS / -1

I have to say that Luke Schenn has been playing more like Luke Schenn than he has like OLAS this season. He's been hesitant and second guesses himself at times. In a game of inches, that little pause can mean a clean break out pass or a turn over for a goal. I was really hoping to see a more physical player this year with a slightly improved offensive game but instead his defensive game remained the same, if not a little worse and Schenn hasn't really shown any offensive improvements either. I definitely haven't given up on him but he's certainly be a slight disappointment so far.

Grade: C-

Jeff Finger

25 GP / 2 G / 7 A / 9 PTS / -10

On a team filled with negatives, Finger has the lowest with a -10! What's more impressive is that he did it in about half as many games. He still plays a physical brand of defence but I remember him going down to block shots a lot more last season. For somebody fighting for that 5th/6th spot, I expected to see more out of him.

Grade: C-

Garnet Exelby

24 GP / 0 G / 3 A / 3 PTS / -3

On the bright side, he has the same amount of points as Rickard Wallin! That's about it though...Exelby flat out sucks. He's a train wreck on defence and looks for that big hit too often...even if it will compromise his defensive position and lead to an odd-man rush.

Grade: F

Goaltending

Vesa Toskala

6-8-2 / 3.72 GAA / .869 Save %

This really needs no explanation.

Grade: Submitted to failblog

Jonas Gustavsson

8-8-7 / 2.93 GAA / .904 Save %

If memory serves me right, 2 of those losses came in relief of Toskala. Needless to say, if The Monster started the season as the starter and didn't get injured, we would be in a much better position than we are in right now. Here's to a Toskala-free crease from now on.

Grade: B+

Congrats

2010-01-06T09:16:00.004-05:00

Congrats to Canada's team for the big win last night.

Do You Want A Resolution?

2010-01-02T15:02:00.004-05:00

I hope everybody's New Years celebration went well. Mine is pretty much the same every year; look back at all the goals I didn't meet then drink until I'm completely shitfaced to forget my failures. 2010 will be different though. Mainly because I have a venue to jot down my resolutions. I can't let my readers down (all three of you). Well here goes, as a sports fan, these are my goals for the new year.

I will not diss the game of soccer.
I will refrain from saying ______ reminds me of a young Halladay because I will simply be setting myself up for disappointment. There will never be another!
I will try to follow the CFL - I've always given the CFL a lot of grief but never much of a chance. This year will be different. As a Saskatchewan native, I'm leaning towards following the Riders.
I will make it out to at least 10 Jays games - The Jays are totally affordable when catching games in the 500s but Doc's departure makes it that much harder to pick games to watch. Here's to Shaun Marcum continuing where he left off before Tommy John.
I will not boo Vernon Wells - We're in it for the long haul, baby. Make me proud. I BELIEVE IN VERNON WELLS!!1
I will not go to Boston Pizza to watch UFC - If I have a party of 7 but only 6 of us are here, there is no reason why I shouldn't get a table. I am tired of your shit, Boston Pizza!
I will not get a bacon-wrapped dog at Burkie's Doghouse.
I will refrain from cursing if the Raptors blow a 20-point lead. Serenity now, serenity now...
I will not pretend to understand Cito Gaston's line up decisions.
NO MORE VESA TOSKALA DRINKING GAMES! My liver is still recovering.

Well, there you have it. Hopefully those are 10 goals that will make me a better sports fan at the end of the year. But like any good baseball player, I will be happy if I can hit .300.

A Year of Emotions

2009-12-30T23:26:00.007-05:00

Have no fear. I have not died. Life just kind of got in the way of blogging (read: I've been spending all my free time playing Modern Warfare 2). I figured with the year dwindling down, I should do one last post before 2009 is over. Don't worry, it won't be a top 10 list. As with every other year, it was an emotional rollercoaster in the world of sports. Being a Toronto sports fan, we've definitely seen more lows than highs. Here are some of the emotions I felt along with the events that caused them.

Hunger

Leafs? No
Raptors? No
Blue Jays? No
Argos? Who cares...but no

I AM HUNGRY FOR PLAYOFFS!!1

Sorrow

Doc's departure - I don't think I've felt this sad since Felix Potvin was traded
Sundin hangs em up - It was expected but it didn't make it any easier
Federer losing to Del Potro - Could have made it 6 straight US Opens. Definitely had his chances to put the match away. I hope he has some great years left in the tank
Dustin McGowan - Okay so we still don't know if he'll be back or not but when you hear whispers of a player never playing again...chances are he will not be the same if he does
R.I.P. Teeder - The Leafs lost a legend but the heavens gained a hero

Joy

Ian White - And his continued strong play. He is nearing folk-hero status
Phil Kessel - I don't care what he cost. I don't remember the last time the Leafs have had a winger this dynamic since...ever!
The emergence of Adam Lind and Aaron Hill - I thought both would be good but I had no idea they would be this good! All they're missing is some sort of dynamic duo nickname.
Kid Kadri - I wasn't sure about the pick at first but watching him at the World Juniors is definitely a joy. The kid is as gritty as they come. The throat-slash was the icing on the cake. Also, this.
Doc vs AJ - The emotion at that event was just phenomenal.
Burkie's Doghouse - Bacon wrapped hot dog...you can get it in a footlong. That is all.

Fear

Waiving Rios - I still give a fuck! Rios still has all the tools to be a star in the league. If he puts it all together next year...Somebody buy me a voodoo doll!
Bosh's future - I'm going to go on and say that Bosh won't sign an extension with us. If that holds true, this future Raptors team will be a joke to watch.
Losing 8 straight - Bring on the Taylor Hall jokes...which sounded so very real at the time
Monster's Heart - So they say it's not a serious procedure and it isn't uncommon to have it twice...but that's still the motherfuckin heart you're dealing with!!!

Rage

Shogun snubbed - Shogun loses a unanimous victory to Machida for the light-heavyweight belt. Everybody else who has eyes thinks differently.
Vernon's performance - As much as I wanted to believe in him (I had him on my fantasy team at some point!) he was just so frustrating to watch at the plate
Vesa Toskala - This pretty much sums it up
13th Man - I would totally be pissed about it if I was a Riders fan
Tiger Woods - You had Elin freakin' Nordegren! What more do you want?

Confusion

Greasegate - Allegations of GSP greasing against Penn were totally bogus. Did they not see how badly BJ got his ass whooped? Greasing doesn't help boxing, take downs or elbows to the face
Jays hot start - Probably the greatest cocktease of all time but it was fun while it lasted
Komisarek and Beauchemin in October - Uhhh....I thought you guys were better than this?
Patrice Bergeron? - Seriously?

Hope

Drabek - You've got some big shoes to fill
In the race - Leafs are in that group fighting for 8th. The playoffs are in sight!
Team Canada - Winning gold on Canadian soil sounds awfully nice
5th straight - As of today, the Raps have won five straight and is one game under .500!
PLAYOFFS!!1 - In 2010. Book it.

Goodbye 2009!

The End of an Era

2009-12-14T23:35:00.005-05:00

I thought I was ready. I thought I said good bye. I thought this would be easy since I already knew it was coming. Truth is that nothing could have prepared me for the news that went down today. Doc was traded to the Phillies. Okay, so it might not be official yet but all that's left are the formalities. While I've seen a bunch of rumours about who we're getting back, I could care less. Today is a day of mourning. The true GBOAT won't be taking the mound in a Jays jersey next April.

Roy Halladay was drafted in the first round, 17th overall in the 1995 draft by the Toronto Blue Jays. I was ten at the time so I have no idea what his early scouting reports read but I imagine it had the words "work horse", "inning eater", "lights out" and "fuckin awesome!" in there. I remember watching his second career start in a meaningless last game of the season. The one where he was one out shy of a no-hitter! Right there and then, I knew we had something special. I just had no idea how good he would be.

While he's had a rough patch early in his career, he has come back from it and prospered. He went from having the highest single-season ERA to being one of the most dominant pitchers in baseball. Here is a player, a generational talent if you will, that I have seen evolve before my very eyes and you know what? He was ours! We didn't have to lure him with a big fat paycheck, we didn't have to throw a boatload of prospects to acquire him, he was home-grown and we were damn proud of it.

Doc came to work day-in and day-out. He was a quiet leader who led by example. Despite his dominance, he always wanted to get better and he hated making mistakes. How many times have you seen him bark at himself when giving up a late game solo shot despite being up six? This is the type of guy you're getting, Phillies fans.

I went to Doc's last home start against Seattle. It was vintage Halladay; 9 ks, 7 hits, complete game shut out. With two outs in the 9th the crowd was on their feet. Doc got the last out via groundball and the place erupted. We knew it was possibly the last time we would see him in a Jays jersey. We stood and cheered as he made his way to the dug out. He looked up at the fans, tipped his cap and disappeared into the tunnel.

We miss you, Doc.

The Post is Brought to you by the Number 2

2009-12-09T23:39:00.005-05:00

Two...two wins in a row at home. Ah-ha-ha!

Count 'em, ladies and gents. Today's win makes two in a row and seven in our last ten. Let's keep it rolling, boys. Tomorrow will be a big test against the Bruins. Let's see how we respond after the spanking they gave us on Saturday.

Two wins for me!

I don't get to go to a ton of games but I've been to enough that I have lost count. Whether it was at the Gardens of at the ACC, there was one underlying theme. I went home winless. Prior to this preseason, I have never seen a Leafs win live before. The closest I've ever gotten was a 1-1 tie against New Jersey back when Reichel was still here. Now I finally broke my streak this pre-season in a shoot out win against the Pens and witnessed my first official win live tonight! That's right, baby! I can go to games guilt-free!

Two Big Signings

It took some time but Beauchemin and Komisarek are finally starting to pick up their game. Both of these signings were supposed to give us one of the more intimidating defences to play against. While both players didn't pay immediate dividends, Burke's and Wilson's patience in them are starting to pay off. Komisarek (for the most part) has stopped taking dumb, unnecessary penalties and Beauchemin is starting to look very sound defensively and also provides a canon on the powerplay.

Number 2

No, that wasn't a highlight from last year, that was a hit Schenn threw on Jon Sim just a couple of hours ago. Like Komisarek and Beauchemin, Schenn is finally starting to look comfortable. He's finishing his checks, he's not chasing the puck and he's not letting his man slip by him as much as he did earlier in the season. Ron Wilson has noticed and as a result, Schenn's minutes have started to steadily increase. He played 19:25 tonight compared to the 10 minutes a game he was getting just a couple of weeks ago. Welcome back, OLAS.

Two goals against

I don't know if it's his health, a fluke or Francois Allaire but Toskala has only allowed two goals in each of his last two starts. Sure, the Leafs have played better defensively but this is still Vesa Toskala. I can't really explain it but I don't want this to end. I BELIEVE IN VESA TOSKALA??/

Two annoying fans

I sat behind two very annoying fans. I knew it was going to be a long night when during the warm-up, one of them asked the other who was in net for the Isles and he responded with "I think Garth Snow."

Other annoying things they did
-They kept trying to heckle Roloson (from the 300s) by screaming "Rolllllll-sooooon"...you know there's another O in there somewhere
-Kept referring to Grabovski as Grabovs. I've heard Grabbo and Grabs but Grabovs? That just sounds weird
-They spat out incorrect facts. Roloson faced 61 shots and stopped 58 the last game. He didn't stop 62
-They added "son" to the end of every sentence and described things as "ill"

Two times the fun

They played "the song" twice! Once before the game and once after. I need that for my ipod. Haters gon' hate!

The Leafs 2009 Skills Competition

2009-12-06T20:42:00.010-05:00

I grew up loving the sport of hockey but sadly, road hockey outside my house is about as competitive of a level as I got to. Heck, I might be the only person born in Saskatoon that doesn't know how to skate! This is why I love skills competitions. It's simply a treat for me to admire the skill level of these athletes up close. Here's a recap of the 2009 Leafs Skills Competition.

Schenn and Finger right before the puck control relay

It all started with the puck control relay. The blue team of Schenn, Finger and Beauchemin beat out the white team of Exelby, White and Kaberle due to Exelby stumbling. This is why you're a healthy scratch, XLB!

The blue team got another point as Komisarek beat out Orr in the individual puck control relay. Seriously, who picks these players? Why is Colton Orr in this event?

The White team giving Primeau a shower

The next event is the fastest skater. My personal pick going into the event was Phil Kessel who ended up having the worst time.

As each skater skated by the benches the opposing team would shower them with their water bottles. I don't know if they were filled with water or yellow Gatorade but there's a golden shower joke in there somewhere. Here's a list of the participants and their times

Jason Blake - 14.09
Phil Kessel - 14.85
Mikhail Grabovski - 14.32 (this was timed with the manual stop watch because the clock messed up and had him at 9 seconds)
Christian Hanson - 14.46
Nikolai Kulemin - 14.05
Wayne Primeau - 14.72

I had no idea Kulemin was that quick.

Hagman winding up for the shot

Next up is my favourite event; the hardest shot. My personal pick for this event was Francois Beauchemin edging out Poni.

Here are a list of the participants and what they clocked

Jeff Finger - 85.6 // 89.7
Tomas Kaberle - 95.1 // 95.7
Alexei Ponikarovsky - 95 // 90.4 but the shot didn't hit the net
Lee Stempniak - 89.7 // 93.3
Francois Beauchemin - 102.2 // 99.8
Niklas Hagman - 95.9 // 84.9
Mike Komisarek - 97.4 // 101.5
Nikolai Kulemin - 93 // 98.4

Looks like my picks are 1 for 2 so far. Poni didn't fare as well as I thought he would though. Also, if Kaberle can blast it at 95+, he should definitely be shooting the puck more often!

The moustache is in full force

Next event was the accuracy competition. My personal pick for this one was Tomas Kaberle going for another 4 for 4 like he did a couple years back. Unfortunately, he was a passer and didn't even get to shoot!

Here are the participants and the results

Niklas Hagman - 2 for 8
Matt Stajan - 2 for 8
Lee Stempniak - 4 for 8
Phil Kessel - 2 for 8
Rickard Wallin - 4 for 5
Christian Hanson - 3 for 7

Rickard Wallin? Seriously? I thought he got deported back to Sweden or something. Kessel rang a couple off the post but most shots were around the middle of the net...you know, right where a goalie's chest would be! No wonder we can't score!

The panel of judges with Monika. My restraining order wouldn't let me get any closer.

They then had a "creative" shoot out challenge. Each player had 2 shots each and the judges (those puck bunnies and Carlton) would score the attempts based on creativity. I believe the shooters were Kessel, Blake, Grabovski and Hagman. Blake was the only player to score and he didn't do the spin-o-rama. What's up with that?

Grabvoski playing keep away with a kid during a break in the action

Next was the 3 on 1 event. This event featured 3 skaters against 1 defenceman and a goalie. The team had a minute to score as many goals as they could. Engelage was in net against the blue team and MacDonald was in net against the White team. Unfortunately, I didn't jot down the participants for this event so if memory serves me right it was

Kessel - Stajan - Ponikarovsky vs White. They scored 1 goal.
Blake - Grabovski - Kulemin vs Komisarek. They scored 2 or 3.
Primeau - Mayers - Hanson vs Exelby. They scored 1.
Hagman, Stempniak, Orr vs Schenn. They scored 1 or 2.

Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

The IR squad of Gunnarsson, Gustavsson and Mitchell.

The last event was the Breakaway. Every shooter got a shot. Only Kaberle, Orr, Stajan and Beauchemin advanced past the first round...on Joey Macdonald and Andrew Engelage! You think our shoot out can use some help? #WeMissYouMats

Francois Beauchemin ended up winning it with the lone goal in the second round via wrist shot.

Hagman, Blake and Kaberle

The White team ended up beating the Blue team by a score that nobody cared about. I was surprised to see Engelage in net instead of Toskala. He wasn't with the injured guys either. Did he get released? Somebody please tell me he did...

This was my first Skills Competition and I had a good time even though my friend was late and I had to wait outside for a good half hour...I could have gotten a Burkie's Dog! The atmosphere was totally different from a game. I guess this is what happens when you replace suits with jerseys. Surprisingly, I didn't spot too many jersey fouls but I did see 2 Pogge jerseys (1 Leaf, 1 Marlie) and a Stralman jersey. I hope nobody bought Tlusty jerseys!

I'm not sure how many tickets were available but the Leafs did a good job making this an event affordable for the kids. Even as I waited outside for my friends this man came up to me and offered me a couple of tickets for free! Speaking of free, people will take anything for free...including styrofoam accuracy targets that says Rogers of them. WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANT ONE OF THOSE???

If anybody is interested, here are the rest of the photos I took

Scrambled Thoughts

2009-12-04T14:22:00.010-05:00

More than Advertised
I hope to have a full post on Kessel some time in the near future so I won't go into too much detail here but being born in 85, I don't remember seeing a winger on the Leafs with such offensive flair since...ever. Kessel is the winger Sundin never had. A lightning quick release, speed in the neutral zone and the ability to finish plays. Somebody Pinch Me. This Phil Kessel guy is too good to be a Leafs winger.

Broken-Hearted

The Monster just went in for his second heart ablation in about as many months. He should be back in a week to 10 days time. While reasons for concern are low, it's the heart we're dealing with here so extra caution should always be taken. We want Gustavsson to be our #1 for the next ten years. There's no reason to rush him back.

Accountability

The Raptors will have none of it. Here are some quotes from the team yesterday

"Every time something happens it's always, 'It's okay, it's all right.' It's not all right. Problems go by without attacking them or challenging them or bringing them to the forefront and getting them solved. We can't keep keep putting them to the back of the bus and just saying, 'That's okay.' It's not all right."

-Jarett Jack

"You've got to address (the defensive issues) and you've got to show people on tape. It's not personal. If you want to win, you're going to have to make some sacrifices."

-Antoine Wright

Does Jay Triano deserve some blame? Yes. But he doesn't deserve all of it. It's a team game and frankly, he isn't the one on the floor getting beat by his man. Whether it be the NBA or NCAA, every player on this team has played on another team before. Did they not teach you how to close out on perimeter shooting? Did they not teach you how to defend the pick and roll? Did they not teach you how to box out for a rebound? Because these are a lot of the fundamental errors I see that leads to buckets by the opposing team.

It's easy to point the finger at the coach and play the blame game and unfortunately for Triano, I don't see him lasting too much longer on this team as he's already lost the respect in the locker room. Sadly, I think it will take more than a coaching change to pull this team together. Even with the worst coaching possible, no team should allow 146 points in regulation...

Marco's Shipping Up To Boston

Dear Scoots,

From stealing second off a walk to your incredible .789 lead-off OPS, I loved every bit of your play. You were great for us last year and you definitely will be missed. With that said, please give me back my spare key and get the fuck out.

Free Pizza

2009-12-02T09:53:00.003-05:00

It almost makes me forget about wasting two and a half hours watching that shit-show known as The Raptors.

What's In The Home Cooking

2009-11-30T23:36:00.005-05:00

Inside the concrete confines of 40 Bay St. is a place opposing goalies come to shine. I don't know if it's just me but it seems like every game we play at home we get stymied by the opposing goaltender. Let's take a look at some numbers.

Oct 1 - Carey Price - 43/46 - W - .935 vs .909
Oct 6 - Pascal Leclaire - 26/27 - W - .963 vs .901
Oct 10 - Marc-Andre Fleury - 18/20 - W - .900 vs .903
Oct 13 - Craig Anderson - 30/31 - W - .968 vs .918
Oct 17 - Henrik Lundqvist - 34/35 - W - .971 vs .912
Nov 3 - Antero Niittymaki - 40/41 - W - .976 vs .932
Nov 7 - Chris Osgood - 23/28 - L - .821 vs .897
Nov 10 - Niklas Backstrom - 37/39 - W - .949 vs .910
Nov 14 - Miikka Kiprusoff - 38/40 - W - .950 vs .922
Nov 21 - Semyon Varlamov - 38/39 - L - .974 vs .919
Nov 23 - Dwayne Roloson - 58/61 - W - .951 vs .916
Nov 30 - Ryan Miller - 38/38 - W - 1.000 vs .933

That is a list of all the starting visiting goaltenders, the number of saves/shots faced, the outcome of the game for them and their save percentage in the game vs their save percentage on the season.

The visiting goalies made a total of 423 saves on a total of 445 shots. That's a .951 save percentage!

In 12 home games, the Leafs only won two, one coming against a bad Chris Osgood and the other against an amazing Semyon Varlamov. The only time the Leafs faced a goalie who didn't play way above of way below his average was in a loss against Marc Andre-Fleury. On average, the opposing goalie posts a save percentage that is .032 higher than their season average! Tack on .032 to Toskala's save percentage and he's the owner of an almost respectable .897 save percentage. Do you know how hard it is to make Toskala almost respectable? Yeah...that's how our luck at home has been.

On the contrary, we are shooting a dismal 4.94%. To put that into perspective, remember how bad Jason Blake was his first season here? Well, he shot a mere 4.5%. We are basically watching a group of Jason Blakes!

Remember when the Yankees dug up their new stadium to get rid of that Ortiz jersey? Well, they ended up winning the World Series. My only explanation is that somebody buried a Georges Vezina or Jacques Plante jersey here and the curse is finally taking effect. That or Ken Dryden's stench is still in the building. Blow up the ACC is you have to, this must end. Until the Leafs get a new arena, we can only hope that the law of averages eventually evens things out because I am getting sick and tired of playing against what looks like a Vezina candidate night after night.

Paul Pierce is a Douchebag

2009-11-28T22:41:00.006-05:00

Whether you are dropping down to block a slap shot or standing in the lane to take a charge, it takes cojones to play pro sports. You wouldn't know it from the following clip though.

This whole video just makes me sick. Let's break it down.
1. Rasho Nesterovic is guarding Paul Pierce on an ISO play. How the fuck does this happen?
2. Paul Pierce's dirty fuckin slam on Bosh. Now when I say dirty I don't mean it the same way the hip kids do. The way he sticks out his knee out to catch CB4 in the nuts is plain dirty.
3. The stare-down. You're a real tough guy, Pierce. You didn't posterize Bosh, you kneed him in the balls. Need I remind you that you're the same guy that did this?

4. The score. It was 87-72 before the dunk. The dunk was totally unnecessary.
5. The Kevin Garnett pan away. From one big douchebag to the biggest douchebag.
6. 4 fuckin Raptors who stood around and did NOTHING!

Rasho Nesterovic, Jose Calderon, Hedo Turkuglo and Jarrett Jack should hang their head in shame for not standing up for their team leader and all-star, Chris Bosh. None of them even wanted to make eye contact with Pierce. This is why teams like The Celtics aren't afraid to step all over the Raptors. They know that they won't have to face the consequences if they do. I haven't seen a Raptor get animated over a play since Charles Oakley. What this clip doesn't show is the only guy who stood up for Bosh, the only guy who gave a shit, the only guy to go after Pierce; that guy was Raptors head coach and good ol' Canadian boy, Jay Triano.

Speaking of balls, Phil Kessel might only have one but he is the fuckin man.

When was the last time you remember seeing a player going coast to coast and scoring a beauty like that on the Leafs? As great as Sundin was, even he didn't have that speed and quick release. There's only one possible reaction to a goal so pretty.

Movembrance Day

2009-11-25T21:51:00.008-05:00

In Niklas Hagman's last 4 games he has 4 goals and is a +3. Now Hagman isn't a bad player by any means but he won't be a 50 goal scorer anytime soon so why the sudden surge? Well, roughly around that time, he decided to go the way of the White and grow a stache. Due to his blondness, it isn't very visible in the above picture but take a closer look. There is indeed some fuzz above his upper lip.

Some might consider it a mere coincidence. After all, it's just facial hair, right? Wrong! Is it a coincidence that Ian White goes from marginal NHLer to top four status after growing his moustache? Is it a coincidence that Wendel was always awesome because he was born with a stache? Face it, ladies and gents, the stache does wonders for your NHL career!

In case you didn't know, this month is the month of Movember. Now I could attempt to grow a moustache but it would look worse than Sidney Crosby's...when he was 13. So instead, I went out and purchased the Stache Generator 2000 and ran the Leafs roster through it. Can you say greatest Leafs team of all time?

It all starts with a good front office

Followed by solid goaltending

Continue building from the net out with the defence

Top it off with some skilled forwards

Highway 61

2009-11-23T23:58:00.006-05:00

Highway 61. Often called the Blues Highway because it runs through the heart of blues country, the Mississippi delta.
To quote a great bluesman

"If it wasn't for bad luck
I wouldn't have no luck at all"

-Albert King

Oh yeah. Fuck off, Vesa.

A Tribute to Vince Carter

2009-11-23T17:54:00.003-05:00

So you may or may not have heard but Vince Carter was apparently approached by the Raptors before Sunday's game to be honoured for their 15th anniversary but he declined the invitation. I don't blame him, why would he accept it? He's not going to win over any fans and will just be serenaded by boos. He's also playing on the opposing team! C'mon, Raptors...I mean are you really going to celebrate the 15th anniversary of the team? Most superstars that played on the team are still in the league! Wait another 10 years when some of them actually retire!

Make no mistake about it though; Vince put Toronto on the NBA map. Along with Mats Sundin and Carlos Delgado he headed one of the deadliest triple threats the sporting world had seen in the early 2000s. This is why I would hate for him to not get the recognition he deserved. Luckily I know a guy who knows a guy that works in the Raptors media room so I got my hands on the tribute slideshow. I present to you the Raptor's tribute to Vince.

It all started in the draft of '98
Picks were swapped and the rest was fate
At 6'6 Vince was quite the high flier
He had no fear. He dunked over guys 7 foot or higher
In the year 2000 the Raptors were still a relatively new addition
But Vince put us on the map by winning the slam dunk competition
However, all wasn't rosy as the team still went nowhere
I'm sure Vince knew it. He had a great view from his chair
But let's not turn this into a rant, we're not here to pick you apart
Because no matter where you went, Vince, you played with the
same
heart.

Fuck This Shit

2009-11-20T03:03:00.005-05:00

Another game, another loss. This time it stings even more because it was to the now second last place Canes. That's right, we're last AGAIN. We couldn't even beat a team who had ONE win in their last sixteen coming into last night. A team who signed Manny fuckin Legace because Cam Ward got hurt. A team with Paul Maurice as a head coach for god's sake...

This has got to be the unluckiest team I have ever witnessed. Up 3-0 in the first and we manage to let the Canes right back in to it with 2 real stinkers in the 2nd period. Sorry, Gustavsson. The honeymoon is over. Get your shit together and control a fuckin rebound.

Thanks, refs for giftwrapping this game to the Canes. That four minute penalty to White was just terrible. If you're going to make such a game changing call late in the game, make sure you get it right and don't call one just because you see somebody falling to the ice.

No biggie though, Ian White will redeem himself! That moustache isn't just all show, you know. What do you know? He scores with 30 seconds left! Pop the bubbly because there's no way we can blow this. Not when it's against the pathetic Hurricanes...

FUCK YOU ERIK COLE

How the fuck do you let the Carolina fuckin Hurricanes score in 28 seconds? I could centre a line with my grandmothers on wing and my sisters on defence and that wouldn' happen. Seriously...What. The. Fuck.

Ah well, at least we got the extra point in OT.

Huh? Intent to blow? How does anybody rule this? How does anybody besides the fuckin ref know he really intended to blow the whistle? If you watch the video, the ref clearly is in place and even has his whistle in his mouth the entire time. Why are you going to wait almost 2 fuckin seconds after the puck crosses the line to blow it?! Nobody was in the crease wacking at the puck. The only guy in there was Hagman and he got bowled into Legace by Erik Cole! Is Ian Wallace the son of Kerry Fraser? FUCK!

Eh, the game went to shoot out and we all that the Leafs have a clause in their goalie contracts that states they must be terrible in shoot outs...

FUCK THIS SHIT

Meeting The Monster and XLB

2009-11-15T15:10:00.007-05:00

Exelby & Gustavsson Q&A

I just got back from the interview and autograph session with Garnet Exelby and Jonas Gustavsson. The event itself started at 1 pm but doors opened at 12 pm. I got there a little bit before 12 and there was already a line up of around 30-40 people. I immediately recognized Monika. That long blonde hair...mmm she smelled so good...
/Jizz in my pants

Dramatization

My stalking aside, here's how the rest of the event went down. The interview session was all done with fans. People either asked questions there or sent Monika questions through twitter. Here are some of the Q&A's I could remember (paraphrased of course).

Q: Are you guys on social networking sites like Twitter or Facebook?

Both: No so if you see any claiming to be them, they're phonies!

The Mad Hatter with The Monster

Q: (To Exelby) I notice you wear a lot of hats, particularly the fedora, is there a reason for that?

XLB: I guess I started it when I started growing my hair long. After showers and such, I needed something to keep my hair on my head so I decided to find a hat. I just hate it when we go to cold places and players wear a suit and wear a beanie or toque with it so I wanted to find something stylish.

Monika: and your style, Jonas? I notice you have a more Euro look.

Monster: Well, you know, you have to keep it Swedish.

Q: How is the attention you're receiving now compared to how things were last year?

XLB: Playing in Atlanta, there is definitely more attention on the team here than there were in the southern US. There are like 400 guys covering the same team so sometimes you get asked a lot of the same questions but I love it. Bring it on.

Monster: We got some attention last year but only during the playoffs. We get that same attention here everyday, like even in the preseason. I think it's great that so many people are into the team.

Q: How do you get pumped for the game?

Both: On game days, we like to take it easy, take a nap and relax until the game.

Not now, Chief. I'm in the fuckin' zone.

Q: Do you guys have any superstitions?

XLB: I don't have any that I'm aware of but I'm sure that subconsciously I do certain things like putting on my equipment in a certain order.

Monster: I like to put on my equipment the same way everyday. It just feels right. I also like to be by myself after the warm ups to collect my thoughts.

I can't wait til you pull one of these, Exelby

Q: Who were your role models growing up?

XLB: I really liked Scott Stevens. He was a good defensive defender and laid out some big open ice hits.

Monster: My role model was Patrick Roy. I believe he was the best goalie to play in the NHL.

Q: What do you like to do in the offseason?

XLB: I like to travel (then he named a shitload of places he's been to).

Monster: I haven't been to too many places. Mostly places in Europe only. I just like to take it easy and hang out with friends.

I have no clue what kind of t-shirt that is but it is awesome

Q: Who do you room with on the road and do you have any funny stories to share?

Monster: Well, nobody likes me so I have my own room. Nah, the Leafs actually gives the goalies their own room so I'm by myself.

XLB: I share a room with Finger. We actually don't see each other too often since we're the ones usually in and out of the line up. When he plays I try to stay out of his way and when I play he does the same for me. As for funny stories, I had a roommate in Atlanta so snored so bad, I had to go to the front desk to get a room for myself. (Now to find out who he roomed with in Atlanta)

Jonas, if you pull a Vesa, I will ship your Nordic ass on the first flight
back to Sweden faster than you can say Ikea meatballs!

Q: If you could have dinner with one person, who would it be?

XLB: Leonardo da Vinci. I just thought he was interesting with his views on life and religion (and he went on and on about it but I was trying to take a picture of The Monster at the time).

Monster: Jeremy Piven from Entourage. I would love to try to trash talk him.

There were a couple more questions that was asked that I don't remember the complete answer to them so I didn't recap them. They both seemed like cool guys. Exelby was the funny guy while Jonas seemed a bit shy with a more subtle sense of humour. Jonas also disses a Habs fan there about having to learn French.

It may be a little hard to read but Gustavsson wrote 'The Monster' beside his signature.

I believe the event will be up on Leafs Space some time next week so keep an eye out for it if you want to catch it in it's entirety!

Lucky 13: Scariest NHLers

2009-11-14T12:30:00.003-05:00

Cross any black cats yesterday? See anything strange? If you weren't aware by now, yesterday was Friday the 13th. In fine Friday the 13th fashion, I will run down some of the scariest players to ever lace them up. Here are 13 NHLers that you won't want to find in your nightmares.

#13 - Zdeno Chara

At a hulking 6'9, 255, Chara is built more like a power forward in the NBA than an NHL defenceman. While he doesn't fight often (probably because nobody is dumb enough to drop the gloves with him) you will not like him when he gets angry. When he's not busy crushing opponents or tossing them like ragdolls, he enjoys eating a good set of twins.

#12 - Gordie Howe

Here's a guy who has played in four different decades and had many offensive records until Gretzky broke them. You would think that somebody with such longevity and offensive prowess didn't like to mix it up too much but there's a reason why the Gordie Howe hat trick is a goal, assist and a fight. If you want to go into the corners with Mr. Hockey, you are guaranteed to come out with one thing; his elbow in your face.

#11 - Stu Grimson

Stu Grimson was one of the premier enforcers of the 90's. With a 6'6 frame and the nickname, The Grim Reaper, what isn't there to fear about? While his points total was rather lousy (39 points in 729 career games), he knew what his job was and amassed over 2,000 penalty minutes doing it.

#10 - Dave "The Hammer" Schultz

Schultz was a part of the infamous Broad Street Bullies teams. With Bobby Clarke being one of the biggest pricks to play in the NHL, the guy protecting him had to have had his hands full. As a result, Schultz holds the single season record for most penalty minutes with 472.

#9 - Georges Laraque

Georges seems like a nice guy, one may even think he is a gentle giant...until they see him bust some faces. Laraque is one of the best enforcers in the game today and a simple youtube search for him will verify that. Is there a scarier vegan on the face of the earth?

#8 - Dave "Tiger" Williams

Here is a player that Tie Domi idolized. That should tell you all you need to know about his toughness. While he was labeled as an enforcer, Tiger could score as well. It wasn't uncommon to see him finish a season with 40-50 points and 300 penalty minutes.

#7 - Tie Domi

By far one of the smallest enforcers to ever play the game, Domi wasn't afraid to drop them no matter how much bigger his opponent was. Domi's fighting strategy usually involved jerseying the guy and dropping bombs on him. Whether foe or fan, nobody is safe from the wrath of Tie.

#6 - Marty McSorley

There's a reason Gretzky scored 2,857 points, that reason is because he had this psychopath patrolling the ice. Lay your hands on the great one and he will get his hands on you. Just take a look at his stats and check out the teams he played on with Gretzky and without. You will notice the difference in penalty minutes.

#5 - Derek Boogaard

With a 23-9-4 fight record (according to the voters at hockeyfights.com), The Boogeyman is no joke. He is regarded as one of the top fighters in the game today. He only has 10 points in 198 games and believe me, it had nothing to do with Jacques Lemaire's coaching style. The 6'8, 257 lb enforcer only has one job and that is to destroy opponent's faces. Just as Todd Fedoruk.

#4 - Red Horner

During his playing days, there were few tougher than Horner. He led the league in penalty minutes in 8 of his 12 seasons. Horner amassed total of 1,264 penalty minutes in 490 career games. Now that might not seem like a ton but you must remember that Horner played in the 30's. To get a penalty you practically had to two-hand a guy over the face.

#3 - Bob Probert

A hockey enforcer? Scary. A drug addict? Scary. Combine the two and you get Bob Probert. In my opinion, Probert was the premier enforcer (note: I didn't say fighter because we all know who that king was) of the 90's. As insane as Probert was on the ice, he was equally as psychotic off the ice. In 2004 he had to be subdued with tasers and stun guns and in 2005 he assaulted a police officer. I definitely wouldn't want to be in this guy's bad books.

#2 - Eddie Shore

Eddie Shore is a nutcase. I'll let his wikipedia entry do the talking

"During their first practice with the Bruins, Shore strutted back and forth in front of Coutu and Cleghorn. Coutu body-slammed Shore, head-butted, elbowed, and tried to torment Shore. Coutu picked up the puck and made a rush at Shore. The two players collided. Shore held his ground and Coutu flew through the air violently crashing to the ice. Shore's ear was almost ripped off but he barely noticed it. Coutu was out cold and was out of commission for a week. Shore visited several doctors who wanted to amputate the ear, but found one who sewed it back on. After refusing anesthetic, Shore used a mirror to watch the doctor sew the ear on."

Umm...WHAT. THE. FUCK.

#1 - Wendel Clark

Wendel Clark was the scariest hockey player to ever play the game, hands down. This guy was basically Ovechkin before Ovechkin but with balls. He scored goals, he hit hard and dropped you faster than you could say 1967. He is also the feature of THE GREATEST YOUTUBE VIDEO OF ALL TIME!

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Did I miss anybody? Who gives you nightmares? Mike Ricci? Drop em in the comments!

As an aside, 7 of the 13 players on the list are from Saskatchewan. If only I stayed in Saskatchewan, I could have became a hulking 6'4, 240 lb professional face smasher. TRUCULENCE

Goose vs Monster

2009-11-08T22:41:00.005-05:00

There seems to be a bit of confusion over what to call Jonas Gustavsson. I know modern day nicknames are typically lazy and uncreative and usually the short form of the player's name. Kipper (Kiprusoff), Kabby (Kaberle), Lou (Luongo) and recently I have heard people calling Gustavsson, Goose. Well I'm here to set the record straight.

Goose

Monster

Goose

Monster

Goose

Monster

Goose

Monster

Let's put an end to calling Gustavsson Goose because he is

THE MONSTER!!!

State of the Toronto Sports Scene

2009-11-06T01:37:00.003-05:00

Take a look to the right. Nothing big but something new added that I will hopefully update with regularity to reflect the current state of the Toronto sports scene.

Game Review: Lightning Strikes

2009-11-03T23:59:00.004-05:00

People say that when it rains it pours and this Leafs season is looking more and more like a fucking monsoon. The Leafs have played well during their road trip, they're coming back to home ice, Phil Kessel is back and they play against a very winnable team...this is an automatic two points, right?

The glass is half full

Phil Kessel looked great. He was a lot quicker than I thought he would be and he created a lot of scoring chances for himself.
Oh Jonas, how I love you. You are such a steady wall back there. Let's never speak of that other guy again.
We drew 8 penalties. We were 2nd in PP efficiency coming into this game. If we keep this up, we'll eventually win another game.
We got another point and as a result we aren't the lone last place team anymore!

Fuck off, it's half empty

Jason Blake is a Leaf...
Its only been one game but let's end this Stajan/Blake with Kessel experiment. Let's put him with somebody who can set him up (Hagman/Grabbo) or somebody who can capitalize on all the rebounds he produces (Ponikarovsky).
The PP went 1/8! We did have some good scoring chances but there wasn't enough traffic in front of the net. The wingers are playing too far out along the boards which allows the PK to keep the puck on the outside.
Gustavsson's puck handling...so the last time he got a penalty for venturing out of the trapezoid. This time he coughs it up instead of letting Ian White skate it up!
Apparently, knocking the puck in by pushing the goalie into the net and dislodging it after the initial save is a legit goal in the NHL...
Jason Blake is still a Leaf...fuck!

Dishing out the Hardware

The Jonas Hoglund Award: Awarded to the player who suffers from the worst case of stone-handitis.

Matt Stajan - What the fuck, Stajan?! You had an open net to shoot at in the first but gave it up. In the third you had a glorious chance to slide the puck in on the PP only to shoot it wide. Then in OT you give up the puck in the offensive zone which led to the winning goal.

The Bryan McCabe Award: Awarded to the player who makes the biggest defensive gaff of the night

Mike Komisarek - Why did you go after the puck instead of sticking with Malone in OT?! This gave him a straight path to the net allowing him to bowl over Gustavsson for the game winner.

The Vesa Toskala Award - Awarded to the Finn that royally screws us

Antero Niittymaki: Stopped 40 of 41 shots...and a good number of them were good scoring chances too. He was in perfect position all night. Square to the puck, left few rebounds and the rebounds he did give up, he kicked to the corners or his d swept them out of danger. Simply put, we ran into a hot goalie tonight.

The Ray Charles Award - Awarded to the blindest motherfucker in the house

Anybody who thought that OT winner was a legit goal...

While we are looking better and better with every game, we need to start winning soon. We'll be heading to the quarter-season mark soon and having only a couple of wins by then just won't cut it.

The Italian Job

2009-10-28T23:30:00.005-04:00

When the moon hits your eye...

11/15 from the floor, 2/3 from beyond the arc, 28 PTs, 5 RBs, 1 BLK

That was Andrea Bargnani's line tonight and if it wasn't for a flubbed wide-open dunk, he would have had an even 30. Il Mago looked like the first overall pick we all expected him to be. He did everything tonight. Drained threes, drove the paint, was tough on D and even had a nice up and under move on Lebron. We all saw his growth last year but this is the year he puts himself on the map.

...Like a big pizza pie. That's amore.

Now here's the Luigi to Bargnani's Mario; Marco Belinelli. I had no idea how talented this guy was. Here I was, thinking he was a one-dimensional shooter like a Jason Kapono (but actually shoots threes instead of those ugly one-handed runners) but I was completely wrong. He moves without the ball, hits step back jumpers and can dunk. That slam he threw down today was sick, wicked and nasty! He also led the Raptors with a +19 tonight. Impressive guy to have coming off the bench.

The Raps were impressive tonight, no doubt about it. Nobody expected them to smoke the Cavs tonight but let's not get ahead of ourselves. There's still 81 games left and there' still stuff that needs to be worked on:

-Calderon needs to find his game. After a bad preseason, his first regular season game wasn't exactly memorable, shooting 1/6 with only 5 pts
-Bosh needs to lay off the jump shots. He sets the tone on offence and when he throws up jumpers, the whole team seems to get trigger happy
-The team as a whole needs to stop throwing up jumpers early in the clock. We aren't the run and gun Phoenix Suns, stop up and run a play
-Perimeter defence needs to tighten up. The Cavs were 9/22 from beyond the arc due in part to a poor job closing out shooters in the second half

I expect the team to be even better as players start to gel. Looks like Toronto can be excited about basketball again.

PLAYOFFS!!1

Three Blind Mice

2009-10-25T05:47:00.001-04:00

Highway Robbery

The Shogun Assassin tonight was not the almighty Dragon but it was the three blind mice judging the fight. Not since the Bisping/Hamill fight have I seen such blatantly bad judging. Just ridiculous.

The reactions to this fight tells the whole story. During the introductions, Machida was greeted with a loud ovation while the only noise Shogun received were a couple of boos. As the fight shifted, the crowd seemed to back Shogun. When the final bell rung, Shogun and his camp raised their arm victoriously while Machida rose his to save face. The facial expression on both men said it all. As they both awaited the judges' decision, Machida hung his head low while Shogun had his up high. When Bruce Buffer made the announcement, I couldn't have been more shocked. The fans were just as equally as displeased considering the same fans who stood and cheered for Machida's entrance is now booing the result.

Shogun pressed the attack, landed way more blows and out-countered Machida. I have yet to see a media outlet score the fight in Machida's favour. Yahoo gave it to Rua, ESPN gave it to Rua, Sherdog gave it to Rua, their forums gave it to Rua, Dana White gave it to Rua, Joe "Daddy" Stevenson gave it to Rua and Anthony Johnson gave it to Rua. Instead of seeing articles on Machida "winning" the fight, it seems like writers are trying to justify the judges' decision instead.

Now some will state the whole "You have to beat the champ" bull shit. 1) If that's the case then Forrest should have never won it from Rampage. 2) Shogun did beat the champ! Sure, Machida wasn't a bloody pulp nor did he look like John Fitch after the fight with GSP but The Dragon still got controlled in every which way.

Fight Metric has their full analysis up and has Rua winning the fight 49-47. The strikes were 82-42 in Shogun's favour. EIGHTY-TWO TO FORTY-TWO! How does somebody land twice the amount of blows their opponent did and still lose by decision? Were the judges watching the same fight? Did they mix up the fighter? I had Machida winning the second round and MAYBE the third only. No matter how you slice it, there is no way you can say Machida won this fight with the straight face. But unfortunately, it looks like there are only three people who can and they were the ones judging the fight at ring side...

Cardboard Craze: 500 Goal Scorers

2009-10-22T23:35:00.005-04:00

Don't try to deny it, we've all done it. Whether you were an old school OPC collector, a 90s Pro Set collector or a youngin who collects Yu-Gi-Oh cards, we have all collected some sort of cardboard at some point in our life. While some of us have given up on it, there are also many who still continue to collect.

Personally, I stopped during the mid 90s when Pacific was just coming out. Seven years later, during Rick Nash's rookie season, my buddy asked me if I wanted to buy some just for kicks. Bad idea. Much like a recovering junkie, I got a little taste and got hooked back into it.

I wasn't much of a set collector. I enjoyed themes. I collected the Leafs in general but I also focused on a couple of budding Leaf prospects...well, at least they were prospects at the time (Kyle Wellwood and Jeremy Williams). I also enjoyed collecting autographed cards and would make projects out of those. One of those projects were to obtain an autograph of every 500 goal scorer. Here are the fruits of my labour in the order they reached the milestone.

1. Maurice Richard
2. Gordie Howe
3. Bobby Hull
4. Jean Beliveau
5. Frank Mahovlich
6. Phil Esposito
7. Johnny Bucyk
8. Stan Mikita
9. Marcel Dionne
10. Guy Lafleur
11. Mike Bossy
12. Gilbert Perrault
13. Wayne Gretzky
14. Lanny McDonald
15. Bryan Trottier
16. Mike Gartner
17. Michel Goulet
18. Jari Kurri
19. Dino Ciccarelli
20. Mario Lemieux
21. Mark Messier
22. Steve Yzerman
23. Dale Hawerchuk
24. Brett Hull
25. Joe Mullen
26. Dave Andreychuk
27. Luc Robitaille
28. Pat Verbeek
29. Ron Francis
30. Brendan Shanahan
31. Joe Sakic
32. Joe Nieuwendyk
33. Jaromir Jagr
34. Pierre Turgeon
35. Mats Sundin
36. Teemu Selanne
37. Peter Bondra
38. Mark Recchi
39. Mike Modano
40. Jeremy Roenick
41. Keith Tkachuk

This actually took me a while to complete. A few of the cards were rather expensive (The Rocket, Gretzky, Lemieux, Yzerman, Howe) and a few were hard to come by (Sundin, Shanahan, Nieuwendyk, Sakic, Gartner). It was a fun little thing to put together and the good part is that it's never-ending because there will eventually be more players reaching this milestone.

While I have stopped collecting a couple years ago, I do pick up a couple of packs here and there or I might pick up a card on ebay every now and then. I guess I will always be a nerd at heart. If you still collect or if you don't but want to relive the nostalgia then come on down to the Toronto Card Show this Sunday. I haven't been since I stopped collecting but I will make an attempt to get down there this weekend.

A New York Minute: A Larry Kwong Story

2009-10-20T23:59:00.010-04:00

Willie O'Ree. Does that name ring a bell? He played for the Boston Bruins and made his NHL debut on Jan 18, 1958. He is the first African-American (well, Canadian) to play in the NHL and he is also referred to as the Jackie Robinson of hockey because many know of him as the man who broke the NHL's colour barrier. What if I told you this isn't true? What if I told you that there was another player who broke the colour barrier a full ten years earlier? Ladies and gentlemen, Larry Kwong.

It's rather surprising that Larry Kwong's story hasn't gotten the attention it deserves. I haven't even heard of it until a couple of years ago. I was talking to my buddy, Chad (who just happens to be a walking hockey encyclopedia), and the topic at hand was Asian hockey players. There's Richard Park, Jim Paek and Yutaka Fukufuji but that list pretty much ended there. There are also a few who are mixed, notably Paul Kariya, Devin Setoguchi and Jamie Storr but not too many of full Asian descent. So Chad asked if I've heard of Larry Kwong, the Chinese player who broke the NHL's colour barrier. I haven't and frankly, I was shocked to learn of this as I thought Willie O'Ree was. I got home, googled it and is indeed true.

With the Leafs having a week off, I had no idea what I was going to write about until Devin Setoguchi lit up the Rangers on Monday and it made me think of this. I decided to drop Chad a line to see if he would like to contribute to the blog and as always, he has came through for me again. Here's a piece Chad wrote for The Insider's Edge. It may be a bit long but I strongly encourage you to give it a read. It's a truly inspirational story about a man and his dream.

The Longest Shot: Retracing Larry Kwong’s Giant Strides

By Chad Soon
Larry Kwong’s dream must have seemed incredibly far-fetched. A child of the Great Depression, growing up in a hockey backwater, thousands of miles from the nearest NHL arena, Kwong was more than just a long shot to make the big league. No one from his hometown of Vernon, BC – no one from the Okanagan – had ever made it. On top of the geographic disadvantage was an even more daunting obstacle: the colour bar.

Kwong was only days old when the Canadian government marked Canada Day by trotting out the “Chinese Exclusion Act.” Chinese immigration was barred, even to the spouses and children of Canadian residents; and all Chinese-Canadians were required to register with the authorities. Voting rights were a distant dream. For nearly a quarter-century, before the act was repealed, Canada Day was also “Humiliation Day” in Chinatowns across the country.

In the context of such official, mainstream racism, one could say that Larry Kwong had a “Chinaman’s chance” of making it big.

“I did face discrimination,” states Kwong. “You always remember what happened when you were a kid. You go to a certain barber, and they wouldn’t cut your hair because you’re Chinese.”

Convincing his mother, a widow with fifteen children to support, to buy hockey gear was another tall order.

“She didn’t think too much of hockey. She came to see me play one game. She thought it was too rough, and she wouldn’t see another game. She said, ‘Why do you want to play hockey?’ I said, ‘Because I can earn some money,’ and I said, ‘I will build you a house with my hockey money.’”

Kwong did not want to consider the alternative: a life of hard labour on a BC farm. He had come to see hockey as his only chance for a better life.

“When I graduated from high school, I tried to get a job in Vernon. But, the Chinese couldn’t work for Canadian people. All the 500-600 Chinese were farmers. My brother and I had a truck to bring goods from the farms to the packing houses. Nobody would hire us as a clerk. Then, when I made the Trail Smoke Eaters, all the players worked up at the smelter. At first they told me there were no jobs. After, one of the directors told me that the ruling at Cominco was: no Chinese allowed to work there.”
In 1942, it appeared that Larry Kwong’s big break had arrived, when he received an invitation to the Chicago Black Hawks’ training camp.

“I was doing flips,” remembers Kwong. “That’s what I wanted.”

Kwong applied for documentation allowing him to follow his hockey dream in the States. He had been denied entry into the US before. A few years earlier, his midget hockey team was on its way to a game in Nelson, BC:

“The roads were bad, so we had to go through the States. But when the American border guard saw me, he said, ‘You can’t go.’ I had to take a train on the Canadian side by myself, and I met the team at the border. Another time, I went on a tennis trip to Vancouver, and again we had to go through the States. The same thing happened to me.”

In response to Kwong’s request, the Canadian government informed the NHL prospect that he could not leave the country, because he was of conscription age. Kwong was held back, despite the fact that the government had put a ban on Chinese conscription.

“That was a rude disappointment,” laments Kwong.

Two years later, in 1944, Canada instituted the draft for Chinese, who were needed to perform special operations in the Asia-Pacific theaters. Kwong was among the first Chinese-Canadians to be called up.

“We had basic training in Red Deer. Some of those boys went overseas and got killed. Luckily for me, they kept me to play hockey to entertain the troops.”

During the war, Kwong attacked opposition lines on an Army team with New York Ranger stars like the Colville brothers, Charlie Rayner, and “Sugar” Jim Henry. The Ranger brass took notice, securing his services for their farm club, the New York Rovers.

In 1946, before a Rovers game, Larry Kwong was presented with the Keys to New York’s Chinatown. The community had found a source of pride in this import hockey player, at a time when the predominant Chinese icon in Western pop culture was Charlie Chan – a fictional character portrayed by a white actor.
Kwong was now sporting a new nickname, which identified him, however ironically, with a fictional giant ape who had terrorized the Big Apple. For the Chinese fans, it must have been a thrill to watch “King” Kwong break out of his shackles, or, rather, bust a few racial stereotypes.

Still, Kwong downplays his impact on the city’s Chinese community.

“There were Chinese people that came to see me play. I don’t know that I was a hero or not. I think it was more curiosity than anything, because I was Chinese. They wanted to see me skate.”

The following year, Kwong led the Rovers in scoring, putting up more points (86 in 65 games) than any Rover had in close to a decade. Near the end of the season, an official with the New York Rangers located the small-town grocer’s son in Madison Square Garden. “King” Kwong was going to get his big chance.

“I was telling myself, ‘I finally made it.’ This is what I had dreamed about since I was a little kid.”

However, at the time, Kwong had more than just a hockey game on his mind. His mentor for the past two years was gravely ill.

“My coach with the Rovers, Fred Metcalfe, said he wished he had had a shot like mine. He thought I had one of the fastest releases. He had a heart attack during one of our games against Quebec. When I made the NHL team, the Rangers, I went to see him in the hospital, and he said to me, ‘Larry, they finally brought you up. You should’ve been up there a long time ago.’ That’s what he told me. And I trust his word, because he was one of my best coaches, along with Toe Blake.”

Kwong’s was no ordinary call-up; his promotion would make international headlines.

“I was very nervous, because we had lots of publicity on it – being the first Chinese to play in the NHL.”

On March 13, 1948, Larry Kwong suited up for the New York Rangers in the Montreal Forum. That night he broke the NHL's colour barrier.

More than sixty years have passed since Larry Kwong made hockey history, and he still has not come to terms with his achievement or with the crushing disappointment.

When asked about his NHL debut, his genial disposition drops; his face and frame tense. He struggles to find the words, which come deliberately, in a voice that is now quiet and constrained.

“I’m still not happy. It’s a very ticklish time with me – to play that short amount of time….”
That night in Montreal, Kwong would not be given a fair shot to prove himself. He was a spectator, warming the players’ bench, until coach Boucher finally called his name late in the third period. After one turn on the ice – a token shift – his NHL try-out was over. Kwong was sent back down to the farm team.

“I was very disappointed I didn’t get a better chance to prove myself.”

Larry Kwong’s anguish was compounded a few days later, when Fred Metcalfe, the coach who knew his star player belonged in the NHL, passed away.

During that season, 1947-48, four other Rover forwards received longer looks with the Rangers than Kwong, despite his being the team’s top scorer.

Kwong had seen enough.
“I immediately contacted Valleyfield, because we played against them and their manager, Mr. Vinet, had said, ‘Anytime you want a job, you give me a call. We want you here.’ As soon as I knew I wouldn’t get a chance with the Rangers, I phoned right away to Valleyfield and they gave me a better contract.”

The Valleyfield Braves’ investment in Larry Kwong would be repaid in spades, as he led the team to an Alexander Cup title, the Canadian major senior championship, in 1951. That season, Kwong was named the MVP of the Quebec League, which would launch future stars like Jean Beliveau, Dickie Moore, and Jacques Plante. Even so, Larry Kwong would not get another shot at the big league.

“When I won the Vimy (MVP) Trophy, our team photographer, Mr. Beauchamp, made a cartoon – he drew it himself. It was congratulations on winning the Vimy, and he had me in iron chains, saying that my adversaries wanted to see me tied up,” laughs Kwong.

Although “King” Kwong was ultimately prevented from realizing his great promise in his sport, he did make good on his promise to his mother. With the money he earned playing hockey, the youngest son built his mom a house.

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Larry is now being considered for the BC Hockey Hall of Fame. The 2010 class will be announced in January.

I believe Chad has another follow up piece on the way and I will gladly post it once he has completed it.

In the mean time, join the Larry Kwong Appreciation Society

and check out his mini-documentary (Part 1) (Part 2)

The Best Burger #2: Apache Burger

2009-10-16T01:22:00.011-04:00

Whether it be NHL/NBA allstar games or 2Pac vs Biggie, the East vs West beef will never end. When it comes to Toronto burger joints, there's Johnny's (#4 on the blogto list) repping the East and Apache (#2 on the blogto list) on the West. Both restaurants have a similar old school burger joint feel but in my opinion, the comparison pretty much ends there. Seeing as I just reviewed Johnny's a couple weeks ago, I suppose this right here is the showdown where only one will be victorious.

Location: 4/5

When I say location, I mean the location for the general Torontonian and not for myself. I live on the east end and let me tell you, Apache was a bitch to get to. I went on a Saturday afternoon on a long weekend and the traffic on the 401 was just crawling. It took me a good hour to get there. The trip would have been unbearable if it wasn't for a couple of good friends and Abbey Road!

The restaurant itself is located on Dundas and perhaps a kilometre or two west of Kipling. Kipling station is also very close by which makes it more convenient to get to for you red rocket riders. You really can't miss the place when travelling on Dundas. It looks like an old school diner and has a neon sign.

As soon as you walk in, you'll notice an improvement over Johnny's because there's...wait for it...SEATS! There's a good row of booths along with chairs. I would guess that it could seat 25-30 people but I wouldn't be surprised if it could handle more.

Don't fret if the line up is long because there's a whole shrine for you to look at. They have a display with pictures of local celebrities (David Miller) and NHLers! I notice a bunch of current and former Leafs like Tie Domi, Tom Fitzgerald, Nathan Perrott and Matt Stajan. There were also other NHLers like Brendan Shanahan! Here, take a look for yourself and see who you recognize (click to enlarge).

Where's Wellwood?

So let's get this straight: tables and chairs, NHLers and the Stanley Cup has been here?

Taste: 4.5/5

I got the Apache Burger which is two beef patties with cheese. They also have something on the menu called a twin cheeseburger. I'm not entirely sure what the difference is between the two but I digress. As you wait for your burger to cook, the guy at the counter will ask you to pick your toppings. From what I remember, the choices were lettuce, tomatoes, relish, pickles, onions, hot peppers, ketchup, mustard and mayonnaise. Nothing over the top but all the standards are there.

Dear Double Beef and Double Cheese, will you marry me?

The burger itself was very good. The patty tasted fresh and was seasoned nicely and didn't taste like a frozen super market patty like Johnny's did. My only complaint was that they used too much sauce. Rather than adding a squirt, they dump a whole blob of ketchup/mustard on your bun and then smooth it out with the spatula. I guess some people may like this but with some bites, I thought it overpowered the taste of the burger and it made eating it a hell of a lot messier.

The. Perfect. Onion. Ring.

Now I know this is supposed to be a best burger review but I wouldn't be doing it any justice if I didn't talk about the onion rings. I'll give props my boy, Leafer1984 for recommending them to me. He told me they are by far the best onion rings he's ever had and boy was he right. Another friend I went with can attest to this as well...but my other friend foolishly decided against getting it because she thought it was too junkie and regretted it all the way home...and probably still regrets it now (Hi Foodtographer!)

Now I know what you're thinking. How can onion rings be THAT great? I don't fuckin know. Just go try them! The batter is a bit thick but surprisingly light so it's not extremely filling. Notice how when you bite into an onion ring sometimes the whole onion comes out leaving you with all batter? Well, the onion on these are cooked to perfection so you won't have to worry about that. Every bite of this gift from god is filled with greasy, battery, oniony goodness.

So a superior burger, the best onion rings known to man and lettuce as a topping?

Value: 2.5/5

My meal, which consisted of an Apache Burger ($6.79), onion rings ($3.89) and a medium Dr. Pepper ($1.79) cost $14.09 after taxes. It certainly doesn't break the bank but it seems rather expensive for a meal at a burger joint. The onion rings were good but at $4, I would have liked to see more than 7-8 of them. $0.50 for one seems a bit expensive but fuck yeah, I would do it again!

I have never had Johnny's onion rings so I don't know how they compare but I've never had to spend over $10 at Johnny's either.

Verdict: 4.5 The Apache, Aldo Raines' out of 5

After visiting both places, I can honestly say Apache has Johnny's beat on everything except price. I suppose you can justify spending the extra few bucks on seats or having the ability to put lettuce on your burger. I only wished I lived a little closer to this place so I could visit it more than once every blue moon. Rejoice the victory and throw up a W. Wesssssssstsiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiideeeee!

Whether you're in the area of not, I highly recommend you give this place a visit if you're into burgers (and more importantly, onion rings). I believe they open late to cater to the clubbing crowds so there really is no excuse not to go. And if you do decide to go, don't be an idiot and get the onion rings! Otherwise your friends will have to listen to you deny about making the right choice then whine about it when they gush about how good it was on the way home.

The Real Story Behind Toskala's Injury

2009-10-13T23:12:00.010-04:00

So as you may or may not have heard, I won tickets to Monday night's Leafs and Rangers game. The contest was hosted by EA Sports to promote their new Be A GM Mode in NHL10. I got to fly down to New York with the team and sat in the manager's box to watch the game with Burkie. Well, you saw the game. It was a complete shit show and Burke definitely wasn't happy about it. After the game, Burke took me down to the dressing room. I'm glad I brought my camera because you would have never believed me if I told you what happened.

"Hey Vesa, great game today.
I know we didn't get the win but it wasn't your fault.
You put together a solid effort!
I saw you go down in the 2nd. How are you feeling?"

"Thanks, Mr. Burke. I was a little sore earlier but it's no big deal. I'm ready to play again tomorrow!
I bet you already regret signing The Monster with me in net"

"...Are you sure you can play tomorrow?
Are you sure you're not hurt?
I don't know...your groin, maybe?
We should get you checked out in case."

"No need, sir. I'm feeling fine.
I'm just going to go down to 5th Ave. and do some shopping. I'll be as good as new after a good night's sleep.
Hey, who is tha...."

"Vesa, I'd like you to meet my new free agent signing, The Bear Jew. You two will be roommates on the road. I'm sure he'll take good care of you"

"Huh? Where am I?
What are you doing with that duct ta..."

"HMMMM!!!
MMMMPPPPHHHH!!!"

Lucky 13: My Most Hated NHLers

2009-10-13T02:00:00.002-04:00

Since everybody loves a good list, on the 13th of every month I will compile a list of my top 13 whatever-comes-to-minds.

While watching the Leafs getting routed, I had a great idea for a list but I figured I should do my 13 most hated NHLers instead because starting off with a list of 13 ways to kill yourself may be a bit morbid.

Now there are some notable retired guys like Claude Lemieux, Ulf Samuelsson, Jeremy Roenick, etc missing from the list but that's because I'm only doing active players.

SI Player Poll's Dirtiest Player

#13 - Steve Ott

Make no mistake about it, Steve Ott is a shit disturber. His job is to get under your skin and he is great at it but there's a fine line between being a pest and being a dirty player. Steve Ott charges, hits high and gouges eyes. As with most pests nowadays, he only drops mitts against lesser opponents and turtles anytime he is confronted by a heavyweight.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

You don't see it, but he gouges the eyes of Moen in this fight. I would guess it happens at the 0:34 mark when you see Moen kicking his feet.

CAT FIGHT!!!

#12 - Alex Burrows

From pulling hair in a fight to hitting a summer rec league goalie in the face I simply don't know how anybody aside from annoying Canucks fans can like this guy.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Hair pulling commences at the 1:23 mark.

Here is Blake celebrating what is probably the 2nd goal in a 8-2 loss

#11 - Jason Blake

Now I hated this guy when he was on the Islanders so you can imagine how I felt when we signed him long-term. He was always a bit of an after-the-whistle agitator, a puck hog and an excessive celebrator. As much as I hated him as an Islander, at least he scored for them. If I see him take a shot into the opposing goalie's chest one more time...

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Just so you know, it's okay to pass to the guys in blue.

The reverse Thomas-Missile

#10 - Tim Thomas

Now I really shouldn't hate on Tim Thomas. I mean, he's such a feel good story. A career minor leaguer who finally gets his big break and ends up winning a Vezina? Disney, I'm sure you'll want to pick up the rights on this. But when Thomas isn't busy doing his best Ron Hextall impression (acting like a tough guy until Felix Potvin breaks your face) or participating in the 100m dash after losing in OT, he is busy launching his body at opposing players.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

I'm still not sure why there wasn't a penalty on this play...

For 4 easy payments of $9.99, you can get your own Alex the ragdoll today!

#9 - Alexei Kovalev

Alexei Kovalev possesses a great shot and has possibly the best hands in the NHL but lacks the heart to put it all together. The way he turns it on and off makes him one of the most frustrating players to watch. Remember when there were talks of him being traded to the Leafs?

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Go Habs Go!

Mike Ribeiro must be part Chinese because I haven't seen diving this good since Beijing

#8 - Mike Ribeiro

Sure Ribeiro is crazy good at shoot outs but he's also the biggest diver in the league. This is actually embarassing to watch and is a total disgrace to the game. And what the hell happened to I before E except after C when spelling his name?

Certifed Douchebag Moment:

The cleanest player in the NHL joins the cleanest team in the NHL

#7 - Chris Pronger

Captain elbows, as sleza likes to call him, doesn't have eight suspensions to his name for being squeaky clean. Unfortunately, he doesn't just use his elbows and he will resort to cheap shots, kicks and even stomps to make sure he gets some time off from the rink and some one-on-one time with the local reporters.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Here's Pronger's audition tape for the role in Saw.

Mommy!

#6 - Todd Bertuzzi

He was once known as one of the most dominant power forwards in the NHL and now he is probably known as one of the biggest goons in the NHL. Sure it might be unfair to label him after one incident but the bad spotlight he has put on the league is still hurting us and detractors will always use this one incident as why the NHL is a violent product.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Does this really come as a surprise to anyone?

Why does it seem like everybody with Napoleon Complex plays in the NHL?

#5 - Jordin Tootoo

Tootoo made a name for himself nailing players in the World Junior's years back and now he's making a name for himself as a cheapshot artist in the NHL.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Jordin Tootoo taking a page out of the Flyers playbook.

Esa Tikkanen 2.0 - Now with more biting power

#4 - Jaarko Ruutu

When I think of Finland, I think of their line of NHL goalies, Selanne's awesomeness and man-purse wielding wannabe NHLers. I seldom think of pesky turtlers who have cannibal tendencies.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Tastes like chicken.

Ring my Bell

#3 - Daniel Alfredsson

From mocking the Sundin stick incident to intentionally firing the puck at Niedermayer, Alfredsson sure has a number of d-bag moments. I think there's only one that fits the bill in every Leafs fans' eye though.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

This just made the series win that much sweeter.

Chris Neil trying to retract his head back into his shell

#2 - Chris Neil

Words cannot describe how much I despise this guy. I can't stop watching this.

Certified Douchebag Moment:

I love it when he clutches his face at the end.

Reunited and it feels so goooood

#1 - Sean Avery

I have a hard time picking just one

Certified Douchebag Moment:

Marty should have Belfour'd him.

Well, there you have it. Agree of disagree, let me know your thoughts. Who'd I leave out? Who do I have that doesn't belong on here? Who is possibly more douche-ier than Avery?

Fuck Off, Optimism

2009-10-11T03:23:00.002-04:00

Dear Vesa, why do you hate me so much?

/Drunk

Monster Down

2009-10-09T20:21:00.008-04:00

I'm sure you've all heard yesterday that The Monster has been put on the IR with a strained groin and is expected to miss at least week of action. In the meantime, The Leafs have called up Joey MacDonald from the Marlies to back up Vesa Toskala.

Calm down...back away from the ledge slowly. Yes, with four games this week before a whole week off, we cannot afford to start the season 0-6-1 but just because Toskala and Joey Mac will be in net doesn't make it impossible to pick up some points. Here's hoping that Toskala used his time off to absorb what Francois Allaire has been teaching him. An early indication of this will be how deep Toskala is playing in his crease. As a butterfly coach, Allaire would generally want his goalies to come out so that when you get down, you cover as much net as possible. One of Toskala's main problems this year is that he has been playing way too deep. This shows a lack of confidence and relies on his reaction rather than positioning. If we see Toskala out on the white ice often, there's a chance we will see a victory.

Another one of Toskala's big weaknesses is his rebound control. When Toskala makes the initial save, there's usually a big, juicy rebound right on the doorstep. Phil Esposito, Dave Andreychuk, Cam Neely...some of the most prolific scorers have made a living off of these goals. Plain and simple, in order to get the W, Toskala needs to work on kicking those rebounds out into the corners.

Now I don't know what I would consider a successful stand without The Monster. I guess I'll be happy with at least four out of a possible eight points? I just hope both goalies don't end up shitting the bed. Now I know there's really no reason for any of us to have faith in Toskala but I simply can't think of a more appropriate time to say this.

I BELIEVE IN VESA TOSKALA!!1
...But just in case he doesn't live up to our hopes, here's a little drinking game for us so that we can forget all about it.

1 Shot
-Every goal Toskala gives up
-An additional shot if the goal was up high
-Every time Greg Millen comments on Toskala playing too deep in his crease
-Every time they cut away to The Monster or Joey Mac

2 Shots
-Every goalie change
-If two goals are scored within 2 minutes
-If a goal is scored off a rebound
-If Toskala bites on the first move on a breakaway

3 Shots
-If Toskala lets one in that your grandmother could have stopped
-Once the boo-birds start raining
-If the score looks more like a baseball game

Shotgun a Beer
-If Toskala lets in the first shot

Drink til you're blind
-If Toskala lets in a 200 footer

.26

2009-10-08T20:28:00.010-04:00

Numbers can tell you a lot of things, sometimes I would even say they're stronger than words, but without putting it into context, numbers are really just a couple of meaningless digits.

Let's say I throw up the number .26. What does that mean to you?

It could be something inconsiderable like the amount of change you have you in pocket or it could be something with a greater significance, like the difference between gold and silver. Now what does .26 mean from a baseball perspective? (no, this isn't a rant about Vernon Wells and his $126 million batting average. I promise.) .26 is the reason the Tigers didn't make the post season.

I'm sure that for the past couple of days you have all heard Tigers fans whine incessantly about the hit by pitch that never was. In case you've been living under a rock, the pitch occurred in the top of the 12th with the bases loaded and one out. The HBP would have given the Tigers a run with 2 outs left, ultimately deflating the Twins and possibly giving them a chance at the Yankees. Instead, the Ump called it a ball and Inge ended up hitting into a fielder's choice with Cabrera forced out at home.

Was it a botched call? Absolutely. Just judging from the photo above, there's no doubt it got a piece of Inge's over-sized jersey. Sure it wasn't a real hit by pitch where Inge gets a shiner for his troubles but rules are rules, he should have been awarded the base. However, over the years we have learned that umpires do tend to screw up calls from time to time and are quite stubborn about it (video replay is something baseball really needs but I'll save that for another time). Frankly, I don't even think the Tigers should have been in that position. Nevermind their embarrassing slide from first, two nights ago they were up one game with one game to go. A win here and they clinch! So one game at home against the sub-500, Alex Rios employing, Chicago White Sox should be an easy win right? Wrong! And you can blame this guy.

Miguel Cabrera was taken to prison on that very morning. Here's a rough time line of what I suspect happened

After Friday's game: Miguel goes partying with some White Sox buddies
Start of party - 5:00-5:30 AM: Miguel is busy getting his crunk on, son!
5:31-6:04 AM: Miguel gets home drunk as shit and wakes up his kid. Wife gets angry and they throw down.
6:05 AM: Wife calls the cops.
6:06-7:29 AM: Cops come and puts Miguel in jail.
7:30-8:00 AM: Tigers GM, Dave Dombroski picks up Miguel from prison.

Somewhere in there Miguel blew .26 into the breathalyzer. Point motherfuckin' two-six! I have no idea how much that is exactly since I've never blown into a breathalyzer but considering it is over three times the legal limit and that Cabrera is 6'4 240, I would think it's a lot.

Now being one who has had a copious amount of experience in being shitfaced wasted, all I can say is WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, MIGUEL?! You have the biggest game of the year right in front of you and you decide to get plastered the night before and enter the game with no sleep? I don't know about you but after a full night of drinking, I can't even walk to my mailbox, nevermind blast homers in front of a crowd of 40,000. But hey, maybe I'm wrong. Maybe that shit's your pre-game ritual. I don't know how you crazy South Americans do things but for the love of god don't go and get arrested doing it. You don't think your actions have an effect on your teammates? You don't think it would get in their heads? You don't think reporters will bring this mess up to them? Seeing how you went 0/4 and left 6 players on base, I would warrant that being hung over took its toll on your game too. What you did was selfish and if I was Dave Dombroski I would exile your ass to a team nobody gives two shits about...like the Blue Jays (one could dream).

So Tigers faithful, you can complain about the HBP all you want but it was a position you shouldn't have had to face, not if it wasn't for .26 anyway. Take it from me, somebody who knows all about botched calls.

Roller Coaster: A Toronto Blue Jays 2009 Season Review

2009-10-06T00:19:00.008-04:00

April 6 - Opening Day win against the Tigers. Adam Lind with 6 RBIs! This Jays team doesn't look like they will suck after all.

April 9 - First big league win for Ricky Romero, giving up 2 ER and striking out 5 in 6 innings. The Jays also win their first series. Troy Tulow-who?

April 13 - The Moonraker belts 2 moonshots off the Twins, including the game winning dinger in the 8th. The way this kid is belting them, there's no way he will get sent down!

April 21 - Doc proves he's human by giving up 5 ER against the Texas Rangers. Texas seems to be one of those teams that gives him trouble from time to time. Let's not even talk about the Kevin Mench incident.

April 23 - BJ Ryan, suffering from crappy pitcher syndrome, hits the DL. Ricky Romero joins him with strained an oblique after a vicious sneeze

April 26 - Ladies and gentlemen, the Blue Jays are for real! They are an offensive juggernaut and has been smacking the leather off the ball. Doc picks up his 4th win and the Jays go on to open up the season with their 6th straight series win. PENNANT!!1 and PLAYOFFS!!1 can be seen on Blue Jays blogs everywhere.

May 2 - The Jays beat the Orioles pushing them to first place in the AL East. Who said the Jays couldn't beat AL East teams? Granted it was the Orioles...but whatever. PENNANT!!1

May 10 - Brett Cecil just got his first major league win with a very Doc-like line:
8 IP, 5 H, 2 BB, 0 ER, 6 K

May 12 - Burnett facing the Jays at the ~~Rogers Centre~~ Skydome for the first time since he fled for more money. Doc dominates the Yanks in one of the most memorable and emotional nights at the dome.

May 15 - BJ is back :(

May 18 - Rios drives in the game-winning run via triple against the White Sox. I bet the White Sox really wish they had this guy.

May 21 - The Jays get swept by the Red Sox at Fenway. Six more games left in the road trip. It's okay, we'll just walk into Camden and sweep the Orioles again, right?

May 22 - With exception of the two moonshots, Snider hasn't exactly done a whole lot. He gets sent down to Vegas to smash some AAA balls.

May 22 - Doc goes into Atlanta to try to get the Jays back on the right track. No dice as the offence comes up empty for him. They got shut down by Kenshin Kawakami (Who?)

May 27 - Can this road trip be any longer? We just lost our 9th straight on the road to the motherfuckin Orioles! The city of Toronto has blocked off the Prince Edward Viaduct as the suicide watch is on high.

May 29 - The Jays welcome back the home cooking and beat the Red Sox 6-3 as Casey Janssen picks up his first win of the season. The team could have only gotten stronger after that road trip. We back, baby! WILDCARD!!1

June 2 - Roy Halladay, MD with a nails performance., striking out a career high 14 batters for his 9th win. GIVE THIS MAN THE CY YOUNG!

June 4 - "You're a bum! You're a bum!" I originally pegged this as a negative movement on the graph but who am I kidding, it provided me and my friends a shitload of Alex Rios jokes and "Who gives a fuck?! Who gives a fuck?!" is a still alive and well.

June 5 - The Jays smacked "the best pitcher in baseball" around like a pimp does his disobedient hooker. Greinke gives up 5 ER in 5 IP...if only it wasn't for that error.

June 6 - The Jays draft 2 Canadian kids with their first 3 picks. These guys must be thrilled to play in Canada. Do they just sign on the dotted line?

June 7 - Another one bites the dust as Jesse Litsch goes in for Tommy John.

June 7 - Roy Halladay with another complete game. This time a shut out against the Royals. I hope you were paying attention, Greinke. Doc just won his 10th and is on pace for like 30 wins! 20 will come, no problem.

June 12 - Doc leaves the Marlins game with a sore groin...everything's going to be okay right? I'm scared...and cold...somebody hold me.

June 16 - Scott Downs go down after trying to beat out a throw to first against the Phillies. Well there goes our lights out closer...where the hell are my fantasy baseball saves going to come from now? Fuck interleague play!

June 20 - The 2 biggest douches show up on a road trip against Washington basically making every game in the series unwatchable. The American audience loves them and they get even more publicity out of it. Seriously, this better not lead to them being on TV more...

June 27 - Jayson Werth goes 4/4 with 2 dingers. Why does it seem like he kills us every time we face him? The Jays need to sign this guy.

June 29 - Doc is back but loses to the Rays. Tampa Bay seem to be Doc's Kryptonite.

July 1 - Happy Canada Day! Ricky Romero shuts out the Rays for a Canada Day victory. Rookie of the year, anybody?

July 6 - We lose 3 of 4 to the Yankees in the windtunnel to drop us to .500.

July 7 - Ken "I need to shut my fuckin mouth" Rosenthal reports that JP is shopping Doc.
1. JP did not say that.
2. Fuck off, Rosenthal.

July 8 - No more BJ as the Jays release the shitballing lefty. You hear that? That's the sound of BJ taking $15 million to the bank.

July 19 - Amidst all the trade talk, Doc throws a 6 hit, complete game gem against the Red Sox. That ovation is for you, Roy.

July 21 - Scott Downs starts his string of very shitacular relief appearances. In this 5-game span, you will see him blow 2 saves and pick up 3 losses, giving up 6 ER in 5.2 innings. Downs is then found tied up in the clubhouse and we find out it was BJ Ryan pitching all along.

July 24 - Doc's "last" start. A great effort but he could only get the no decision. Jays end up losing to the Rays AGAIN. Seriously, I hate Carl Crawford!

July 25 - Seriously? The Jays blow a 8-0 lead? To the fuckin Rays? I'm seriously hating this team as much as I do the BoSox and Yankees right now...The Jays, not the Rays.

July 31 - Scott Rolen bids farewell. I will miss having this guy at the hot corner but all the "experts" seem to think the Jays made out like bandits on the deal. Long live the GBOAT!

Aug 4 - A very uncharacteristic performance from Doc, giving up back to back jacks in the windtunnel to the Yanks. Doc has 1 win in his last 8 starts. How is this possible?!

Aug 5 - BJ Ryan is released by the Cubs. Looks like a 84 MPH heater isn't in high demand these days.

Aug 7-9 - Back 2 Back weekend, baby! The Jays season might not have been great but this weekend is a celebration, bitches! Joe Carter! Robbie Alomar! Paul Molitor! Catch the taste!

Aug 10 - So long, Alex. Rios has been claimed off of waivers. Surely, he'll thrive in a new environment, right? We will always have "Who gives a fuck?!"

Aug 17 - Jays can't sign our Canadian draft picks. Can we hang Paxton and Eliopoulos for treason?

Aug 18 - Travis Snider gets called back up and immediately impresses going 2/3 and blasting a solo shot. Unfortunately it was in a losing cause but hey, at least he got his kinks worked out!...I hope

Aug 31 - Cooperstown is getting ready for Adam Lind as he gets 8 RBIs in a game. Wow.

Sept 1 - Scott Rolen is no longer the GBOAT as it turns out he hates Canada. I can't believe I wanted to share fossil fries with you.

Sept 4 - Harry Leroy Halladay III 1 hits the Yankees in another dominant complete game. Best pitcher in the league, bar none.

Sept 15 - "What have I seen from Rios? A lot of outs. The only batting ninth guy making $5 million was me. This mother [bleeper] is making $10, $12, $14 million, he ain't going to be batting ninth [in 2010]. I'm going to make sure he earns his money. But right now I have to put him there because he's struggling. Next year, if we have Rios batting ninth we're in deep [crap] once again.''
--------------------------------------------------
FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! Jorge Posada is a dickhead. Jesse Carlson is a badass. Rock that welt with Pride, Jesse.

Sept 21 - David Purcey gets his first win this season. About fuckin time. I had high hopes for him too. He was even on my fantasy team at one point! There's always next year...

Sept 23 - Lighthouse Hill is truly the bright spot in this dark season. Hill gets his 100th RBI in walk off fashion. Does this guy do anything normally?

Sept 25 - Doc's possible last home game and he doesn't disappoint. Another complete game, another shut out. Can we just give him the Cy Young now?

Sept 29 - Adam Lind goes beast mode again and hit 3 HRs. Would have hit 4 if it wasn't for Asswipe Papelbon.

Sept 30 - Doc has Lind's back as he beans Ortiz (god, I love this video). Just another day at the office as Doc notches his 4th(!!!) complete game (a 3 hitter) this month and 2nd(!!!) shut out in as many starts. WE LOVE ROY HALLADAY!

Oct 2 - It appears that there is turmoil in the clubhouse yet again. I thought Gibbons took that with him when he left. Oh yeah, fuck off Ken Rosenthal.

Oct 3 - JP sent packing. Along with the bad, he has also done a lot of good things for the Jays but after 8 years, it was time for a change. Everybody knew it. I wish Alex Anthopoulos the best and hope he can maintain a competitive team next year. There really is nowhere to go but up from this clusterfuck of a season.

-----------------------------------------------------------
This season has definitely had its share of ups and downs. I can't think of a better comparison than a roller coaster. While we hit high points like Doc having some unbelievable lights out performances and the emergence of Aaron Hill and Adam Lind, we have also hit low points like the 9 game losing streak, Cito-gate and Kevin Millar batting clean up. Regardless of the ups and downs, as Jays fans we hung on for the ride til the very end.

Help! I Have a Monster in my Closet

2009-10-01T14:25:00.001-04:00

Honouring The Captain

2009-10-01T01:26:00.001-04:00

After 18 seasons in the NHL, Mats Sundin finally hangs em up today. While it was something I already anticipated, I found that it really affected me more than I thought it would...much like his return to Toronto last season.

Not having the fortunes of being brought up in a Leafs (or sports in general) household, I didn't become a Leafs fan until I got introduced to the game of hockey by school mates. I officially fell in love with the Leafs during their '93 and '94 playoff runs. Cue the summer of '94; I was nine, girls had cooties and Wendel Clark was traded for some Swede. I vividly remember the photo of a tearful Wendel on the front page of newspapers. I remember thinking how wrong that photo looked. Wendel was the baddest motherfucker of all time, he doesn't cry! (It wasn't until years later that I would discover how attached one could get to a team) Nine year old me had no clue who Mats Sundin was and I didn't have internet, nevermind a venue like PPP to discuss the trade at. The only thing I remember thinking is that Mats Sundin better be good because he has some big skates to fill.

Sundin didn't disappoint. He donned a funny looking Jofa helmet and led the Leafs in points, scoring at a point a game pace, during the lock-out shortened season. Sundin eventually ditched the Jofa helmet but still led the team in scoring in every season as a Leaf except one. Not only did Mats score, he scored when it mattered. Captain Clutch is tied for the most regular season overtime goals ever and has the most goals in the third period since 2000 (Okay, I'm not sure of the exact year but since I hate looking up stats I'll just assume it's 2000).

Sometimes I wonder how Sundin racked up the amount of points he did playing in the dead puck era. Jagr had Lemieux, Sakic had Forsberg and even Selanne had Kariya. Not once did Sundin get to centre a bonafide stud winger on the Leafs. Sure, he had Mogilny and Roberts at one point but Mogilny was way past his prime and Gary Roberts wasn't the 40-50 goal scoring Gary Roberts, he was a re-born Gary Roberts who came back from retirement due to a neck injury! A list of Sundin's linemates during his tenure with the Leafs would look more like this: Jonas Hoglund, Fredrik Modin, Sergei Berezin, Lonny Bohonas, Steve Thomas, Nik Antropov, Alexei Ponikarovsky, etc. Serviceable NHLers? Yes (some, anyway) but nowhere close to being elite players in the NHL. I have no idea how he put up with that shit but he did. Not once did he complain about the quality of his linemates. Not once did he demand a trade. This just shows the class he exudes and how good he really was to put up as many points as he did.

Jaromir Jagr
Mark Messier
Wayne Gretzky
Steve Yzerman
Joe Sakic

I don't think there's any question that these players are(were) first ballot hall of famers but what else do they have in common? None of them scored 20+ goals for 17 straight seasons. Sundin was able to produce this feat despite a lock out shortened season. This just shows that Sundin is truly a model for consistency and durability. Just imagine his totals if he did have a couple of quality wingers to play with!

Make no mistake about it, Sundin is a Hall of Famer. Now I know what the detractors will say. "Sundin doesn't have any cups to his name!" Well, Borje Salming doesn't have a cup, Marcel Dionne doesn't have a cup, Mike Gartner doesn't have a cup, Brad Park doesn't have a cup and even Ray Bourque wouldn't have had a cup if he didn't go to Colorado for a season and a half. The Stanley Cup argument might be valid for a fringe Hall of Famer but Sundin should be a lock and he has the stats and the international accomplishments to back it up.

-First European drafted 1st overall
-Named to 9 all-star teams
-Over 500 goals and 1,300 points (Only Swede to perform either feats too!)
-A point per game player (again, most of which were in the dead puck era with shit teammates)
-Olympic Gold
-Most over-time goals ever

There really is no debate.

I wasn't able to score tickets to Sundin's return with Vancouver so I'm going to start saving my money for Sundin night. It will be great to see our Captain on the ACC ice one more time. I know the Leafs' stance on retiring numbers but they really should do it for Mats, the greatest Leaf ever.
Take it away, Bob Cole.

Fresh Ice

2009-09-28T01:20:00.000-04:00

Ladies and gentlemen, if I can get you to look at that little light and wait for the flash

I know most of the Barilkosphere will be blogging about Vesa Toskala's ECHL calibre performance last night but I won't. I'm all about optimism this year. Let's take a look at what we have to look forward to. With the preseason all wrapped up, it's only a matter of days until the regular season is upon us. Let's forget about the JFJ years, let's forget about last season, let's forget about Vesa Toskala's abysmal preseason stats; come Thursday, we will have a new start. As LD so eloquently puts it, "Fresh ice, fools!"

In fine Tyler Bozak fashion, let's take a look at seven things to look forward to in this 2009-10 Leafs' season.
The Seventh Samurai, Tyler Bozak

Not only does Bozak have a sick nick name (post coming in a near future) but the guy has skills. Just check out this shorthanded goal against the Bruins. From watching him in the preseason, it is clear why there were so many team interested in his duties. Bozak is a hardworking hockey player with smart hockey sense. He can do it all. He can play on the powerplay, can kill penalties and he's defensively sound for a rookie. Ron Wilson even put him on the point on some powerplays because he can be trusted back there. Sure, the shorty he scored was great but it wasn't even my favourite highlight of his this preseason. This was. While Bozak will most likely start the season with the Marlies, I have a feeling he likely won't end the season with the Marlies. Viktor Stalberg Telling the Marlies to Fuck Off

Stalberg was a dark horse to make the club coming into training camp but he played his ass off this preseason and boy can he play. He racked up 6 goals this preseason to go along with 2 assists for 8 points in 8 games (this is purely going by my memory so please correct me if the stats are wrong). Sure, these are preason stats but it's hard not to get a raging boner just watching him play. Stalberg looks like a player who can make something out of nothing the way he can turn on the jets and cut through the opposing team's defence. I'm glad he got a spot on the team and it was well deserved. This guy will be a stud in the NHL. Nazem Kadri back with London

Don't get me wrong, Kadri had a good preseason but he wasn't dominant by any means. Having him back in London can only do good things for his development, especially when it comes to adding some size to his frame. He was simply too easy to knock off the puck along the boards. Kid's got a shitload of talent though and will be a dominant playmaker for many years to come. Phil Kessel's Return

Was last year's 36 goal season a product of Marc Savard's passes or is Kessel the dynamic sniper we've been lacking since...Rick Vaive? Only time will tell but I have a feeling that last season was no fluke. With Kessel already starting his on ice work outs, the anticipation for his first start is growing steadily. Luckily, we should have him in November, when it matters. I'm glad we got him locked up long term. Can you say Kadri to Kessel? /splurt

The Monster, Jonas Gustavsson

Okay I didn't want to bring it up but Toskala looked completely hopeless this preseason. I've never seen scoring come so easily since the time I slipped roofies into...uhh...since we had Andrew Raycroft in net...yeah, that's it! Luckily Burke hauled in the Monster from Sweden this offseason. While we've only seen him play 3 periods of preseason hockey, he was flawless, even extending one of his tentacles to make this stop on a 2 on 0. I was already a believer when his name first appeared on the Leafs' radar, solely based on his SEL stats. After seeing him play, I have no doubt in my mind that he will supplant Toskala as the starter and will be one day mentioned in the same breath as past goalies like Johnny Bower, Felix Potvin, Curtis Joseph, Ed Belfour, etc. Donnybrooks

I love a good hockey fight and we're guaranteed to see a lot of them this season. The Leafs threw down 18 times this preseason. I believe the league average was around 0.60 scraps a game last year. Truculence will soon be the most searched term on google. PLAYOFFS!!!1

While we're still far from a Stanley Cup team, the pieces are there and the puzzle is starting to fill up. After four years without any playoff hockey, I'm glad that we will be returning to the post season this year. That's right, I said it. You better book a seat now because the bandwagon is filling up.